Saturday, January 30, 2016

Calm

I give terrific dream analysis though often I find it impossible to decipher my own. This one I did and it still resonates with me days later.

In the dream I was in a room - they're always interesting these rooms, bear no relation to any dwelling I've ever lived in or been in, though sometimes there's a faint familiarity.

At the outset I tell you I don't believe in any form of afterlife and have written extensively about my god-free life so I don't attach any kind of hereafter messages to any dreams I have about dead people.

So this dream: I was housekeeping in this large white room, surrounded by cleaning utensils. I don't housekeep in real life. I keep things sanitary and hygienic but heavy cleaning is Emma's job. So here I am sitting on the floor in this room staring at a vacuum cleaner, wondering about nozzles and power cords when I hear a cough. And I look up and at the doorway is my mother and she has a doll, infant sized, over her shoulder and she's patting it and pointing at it with her other hand. She's silent but insistent I look at it. I get up off the floor, away from the furniture polish and bottles of cleaner and start to walk over to her very slowly, puzzled, saying "Mum, Mum?" over and over. She's smiling but her hands keep moving in the same pattern.

And I wake up suddenly and I'm crying so hard in my loss and grief that it takes me about five minutes to stop and I, the dream expert, breathe in some calm and analyze.

Everyone appearing in a dream is just another aspect of ourselves. And for once, this one's clear as a bell

I can fooster my way round, distracted by the baubles of life and neglect my doll, my creative spirit which needs stroking and care and attention.

And all the promises I made to myself a few months ago about entering more competitions, writing new material, were sucked away by other distractions, some major like the writing workshops I'm giving, others minor like projects in my town and, lawd, editing, editing and editing an anthology (don't ask, unpaid work more's the pity, I was sucked in, my own fault).

So yeah, time to clean house for sure and concentrate on, well, my bliss.

10 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I need to establish very clear boundaries, Ramana, very, very difficult for me to do.

      XO
      WWW

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  2. I hope you do. I have been struggling with that for years...

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  3. As you say, everyone (and everything) in a dream is an aspect of ourselves, and if you look at dreams in that light they can be very illuminating. Unfortunately I don't remember many of my dreams but the ones I do recall can be quite thought-provoking.

    Modern life offers so many distractions, it can be hard to shut them all out and concentrate on the job in hand. I read that Jonathan Franzen can only get down to serious writing by shutting off the entire internet.

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  4. The Internet is one of the greatest distractions of all time. It's akin to being in the tower of Babel whilst trying to write an essay. I must get back to disconnecting more frequently.
    XO
    WWW

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  5. I'll beg to differ about afterlife! (But it's just as well we're all different. That's what makes everything so interesting.
    I've had some very vivid dreams lately and sometimes I can produce a meaning very clearly, other times not!
    Maggie x

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    1. Yes, all our predictions are different and our belief systems Maggie. Feel free to send me your dreams anytime you need an interpretations :)

      XO
      WWW

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  6. You can't fool the Muse. She comes and goes as she pleases. She'll be back when she's good and ready.

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  7. Or there just may be an afterlife...(Really just a continuation of this one as the body just falls away and you are what you always are pure consciousness) and possibly your mother is trying to give you a message to see to your child? May be having troubles?...I interpret as well...best to you always:)

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