tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post1810253970785689514..comments2024-03-27T13:32:06.780-02:30Comments on The Other Side of Eighty: Post Mortem ExplosionsWisewebwomanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-49965471117439505102013-11-29T23:05:23.486-03:302013-11-29T23:05:23.486-03:30I can empathise with your second friend here - thi...I can empathise with your second friend here - this happened when my grandfather died. He left the entirety of his estate to be split six ways between his children. The majority was tied up in the house, which my aunt was still living in (had never moved out, now in her mid-forties). She refused to move out, and, as an alcoholic, bouncing from job to job, didn't have the money to buy the rest of her siblings out. She (bolstered by her drinking buddies, who saw the possibility of free booze for life if she won) took the family to court, and added into the suit that my uncle (eldest and executor) was defrauding the estate. The uncle, in an attempt to stave off the costs, actually bought her a flat to live in, which she refused to move into. In the end, it went all the way to the high court, was dismissed in about five minutes, and the lawyers took all of the money.<br /><br />However, the plus side was that the whole thing brought the other five siblings much closer together, when we were reasonably fragmented as a family.<br /><br />In my immediate family, I would like to think that we won't have the same issues, because of the pain that we have already been through. But, we'll never know until the time comes.Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17965300148218903639noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-55761970737761127732013-10-04T11:13:14.908-02:302013-10-04T11:13:14.908-02:30OWJ:
I am so sorry to hear this, how upsetting fo...OWJ:<br /><br />I am so sorry to hear this, how upsetting for you!<br /><br />A small comfort to know you are not alone.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-63807908445262504882013-10-02T18:51:17.213-02:302013-10-02T18:51:17.213-02:30So true
you take me back to my mother's death ...So true<br />you take me back to my mother's death 13 years ago.<br />Stepfather with mind issues tore up her will, attorney who prepared had died years before, stepdaughter<br />who never made a visit - shows up.<br />My mother and father's home and belongings went to one it was not suppose to go to.<br />Legal actions would have just been a benefit to attorney. So you just try to forget...<br />So sadOne Woman's Journey - a journal being written from Woodhaven - her cottage in the woods.https://www.blogger.com/profile/12548226150115102345noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-11818150280828666762013-10-02T00:36:49.458-02:302013-10-02T00:36:49.458-02:30SAW:
I'm sure you must, every twist and turn,...SAW:<br /><br />I'm sure you must, every twist and turn, yeah?<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-14547629871838356662013-10-01T22:35:32.318-02:302013-10-01T22:35:32.318-02:30Tome and again, I've seen this sort of thing i...Tome and again, I've seen this sort of thing in my work. Estates bring out the ugly in people, that's for sure.Secret Agent Womanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07564690116156754219noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-47395620556064664172013-10-01T02:36:46.891-02:302013-10-01T02:36:46.891-02:30Hattie:
LOL, how true!! What are they anyway? Rem...Hattie:<br /><br />LOL, how true!! What are they anyway? Remind me....<br /><br />XO<br />WWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-85834819958031294972013-10-01T02:36:08.996-02:302013-10-01T02:36:08.996-02:30Maggie:
My friend also feels it was with the coll...Maggie:<br /><br />My friend also feels it was with the collusion of her father who suspiciously hid some documents on her one time when she wanted to make sure he was OK financially.<br /><br />XO<br />WWW<br />Wisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-73765195880655266582013-10-01T02:34:42.801-02:302013-10-01T02:34:42.801-02:30Anon:
I'm working on a project at the moment ...Anon:<br /><br />I'm working on a project at the moment to present on elder abuse at different venues, so your links are very, very helpful, thank you.<br /><br />Good for you on bowing out, did it change your relationship with your sib?<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-6745478178943586192013-10-01T00:38:33.396-02:302013-10-01T00:38:33.396-02:30family values!family values!Hattiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13297404386730167834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-44573416206811501692013-09-30T18:23:41.045-02:302013-09-30T18:23:41.045-02:30It seems there's nothing like a death in the f...It seems there's nothing like a death in the family to bring out the worst in everyone. I can see all points of view but the one who embezzled for years takes the biscuit!<br />Maggie x<br /><br /><a href="http://granniemay.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">Nuts in May</a>Maggie Mayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06183886005936250976noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-47139943678190352782013-09-30T13:37:03.664-02:302013-09-30T13:37:03.664-02:30After death is a problem yes, I've been there ...After death is a problem yes, I've been there too, and I just bowed out and left it up to sibling. I contested nothing even though I got one-third of what sib got. I signed when the papers were sent and that was that. <br /><br />But before death, with our elders living on in nursing homes enters another disaster. Seniors accounts and pensions are bled to cover costs, and frail elderly are medicated into harm with families not being able to refuse. <br /><br />"Doctors deny power of attorney rights"<br /><br />http://www.seniorsatrisk.org/2012/09/update-of-previously-reported-case/<br /><br />Beatings, rapes and bedsores, theft, and murder in nursing homes/care centres: across Canada. <br />http://elderadvocates.ca/case-studies-2/Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-76240461130202184312013-09-30T13:23:49.742-02:302013-09-30T13:23:49.742-02:30Anon:
Great idea for an animal shelter, now I kno...Anon:<br /><br />Great idea for an animal shelter, now I know why people formalize that in wills.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-85805307951386993642013-09-30T13:21:18.383-02:302013-09-30T13:21:18.383-02:30Nick:
Sensible and co-operative I've never ob...Nick:<br /><br />Sensible and co-operative I've never observed after the funeral and the funeral meats have been put away. <br /><br />Claws and greed more likely. And hitherto unvoiced entitlements.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-74491984252952896812013-09-30T13:19:45.896-02:302013-09-30T13:19:45.896-02:30Pinklea:
Exactly. No one ever anticipates eruptio...Pinklea:<br /><br />Exactly. No one ever anticipates eruptions, I certainly didn't. And neither did my friends. All tied up with the grief and the emotions and the clinging to memories.<br /><br />We can never ever predict.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-71994107155123494382013-09-30T13:18:28.491-02:302013-09-30T13:18:28.491-02:30GM:
I'm sure you can.
XO
WWWGM:<br />I'm sure you can.<br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-14841135729696060742013-09-30T10:01:54.857-02:302013-09-30T10:01:54.857-02:30I have to echo pinklea. Jenny and I still have liv...I have to echo pinklea. Jenny and I still have living mothers, and we assume that when the time comes to sort out wills and estates all the relatives will be sensible and cooperative. But who knows if that will be the case?nickhttp://nickhereandnow.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-85056740442311270992013-09-30T01:25:28.079-02:302013-09-30T01:25:28.079-02:30My mother often worries about how my brother and I...My mother often worries about how my brother and I will handle things when she passes on. We keep telling her that we'll share everything just the way she wants, that she doesn't have to worry, that no one will try to take more that their share. And we trust each other and we mean it. But I guess we won't really know for sure until the time comes, will we?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-20856834973567120092013-09-29T17:25:27.720-02:302013-09-29T17:25:27.720-02:30I could fill a book with stories of similar situat...I could fill a book with stories of similar situations. As my Jack used to say: "Dead money brings no luck"!Grannymarhttp://grannymar.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-60935057264595713532013-09-29T16:07:20.132-02:302013-09-29T16:07:20.132-02:30God in Heaven, we went through scenerio number 1 w...God in Heaven, we went through scenerio number 1 with husband's family, who were very well off. I swear the older brother would have killed us for a penny. He actually did physically attack us, and threaten our lives, at the advice of the lawyer we moved, changed phone numbers, etc. <br /><br />When my Dad died three of us gave our shares to our fourth brother, who was having medical problems and great financial stress. <br /><br />Those people who leave everything to the local cat shelter have a good idea. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-64000838179549102782013-09-29T13:43:41.195-02:302013-09-29T13:43:41.195-02:30CC:
It baffles me too as to why the common grief ...CC:<br /><br />It baffles me too as to why the common grief and memories don't bond a family tighter.<br /><br />I have a challenge with my estate which I won't get into here. Needless to say, it is causing me some grief, though the estate won't leave much :)<br /><br />Yes, one child to inherit has untold benefits!<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-82649041304611130272013-09-29T12:12:11.641-02:302013-09-29T12:12:11.641-02:30I'm afraid there are a few cracks showing in m...I'm afraid there are a few cracks showing in my family since my father died last year, I just don't understand why it does not bring people together, after all, we are all we have left.<br />I'm so glad I have only one daughter, no fighting, no expectations from anyone else, I always felt guilty she would not have another to share the grief with, not anymore!The Cranky Crone, she lives alone!https://www.blogger.com/profile/18008449764395110002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-53586795928545270772013-09-29T11:45:18.955-02:302013-09-29T11:45:18.955-02:30Marc:
LOL. I often say "Walton's Mountai...Marc:<br /><br />LOL. I often say "Walton's Mountain never existed, people."<br /><br />Most times the happy endings just don't happen.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-51968114326311620352013-09-29T11:43:28.196-02:302013-09-29T11:43:28.196-02:30Ramana:
Money is the root, isn't it?
You are...Ramana:<br /><br />Money is the root, isn't it?<br /><br />You are blessed indeed. Most of my family is at peace too.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-751887204693226552013-09-29T11:42:41.954-02:302013-09-29T11:42:41.954-02:30Irene:
Stab in the heart doesn't quite cover ...Irene:<br /><br />Stab in the heart doesn't quite cover it. My friend is heartsick and demolished as it has riven the family apart.<br /><br />I personally feel they will never recover.<br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14874528.post-90199389813661141172013-09-29T11:41:21.698-02:302013-09-29T11:41:21.698-02:30Ann:
"Held together by the parents" I l...Ann:<br /><br />"Held together by the parents" I like that. <br /><br />XO<br />WWWWisewebwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15281689872840844191noreply@blogger.com