I'm the eldest, in the middle, with baby sister on my lap, surrounded by my four brothers.1959.
We come together from 4 different time zones every Sunday afternoon and have been doing this for nearly 6 years. We never miss. We tune in from cars, from parking lots, from beaches, from cabins, from little nooks in our homes away from everybody else. We are siblings.
The conversations lasts for hours. You'd think 6 people would have run out of topics, out of conversation. Some of us quietly get served dinner or lunch or a snack by spouses or grandchildren who tiptoe away quietly knowing this is a sacred, private time for the 6 of us.
We were six siblings, now we are 5. We lost our third eldest in November last year from cancer. It broke us all for a while. So 5. We changed the name of our group to his name.
We go on Zoom religiously for this weekly meeting and check each other out, talk of health, talk of childhood, talk of memory and challenges.
It was fairly uptight when we started, little deep or personal sharing but as the years swept onwards, there are no holds barred and often we go on our private WhatsApp during the week too if things are getting a bit rough with one of us. We are carrying the fifth born of us at the moment with a rare form of cancer he has been diagnosed with. He had an operation last Friday.
We have the odd political disagreement but are secure, very secure, in the knowledge that we care deeply for each other and are there through thick and thin.
We don't talk about how extraordinary this is. But we have said to each other we have come a long way in getting to this place of peace and love and harmony. Something that would have been impossible to imagine even a decade ago. There were mini-alliances within our sibling framework and a lot of petty infighting and yes, jealousies and failures. Magic like this doesn't happen. It is work and consciousness and someone breaking the mould of silence and secrets.
But we did it. We now trust each other without reservation. And look out for each other in thick or thin.
I feel blessed.
I'm so happy you have achieved this! Hurray for you all.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jean, we are very lucky and I believe it is quite unusual as we live in many parts of the world and different countries.
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WWW
So many families permanently disconnect, so that you have all come together and are close is an decent achievement. The worst words between my siblings and myself has been a rare sarcastic comment.
ReplyDeleteIt is very extraordinary and I am glad you have this. I text back and forth with my brother more than I used to, but personal things are rarely mentioned since we didn't grow up together and have different memories. I catch up with my sister once a year when my brother takes me, but she doesn't have a phone or computer, being brain damaged she wouldn't know how to use them, so once a year we visit just to make sure she is still okay, we sit on the front porch for that since she is a hoarder and her house is full.
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