Age presents wisdom (acceptance, too) if we let it. For instance, happenings that would have devastated me years ago no longer do.
For the first time ever in my life I awoke this past Christmas morning with nothing to open. In past years the pickings were getting slimmer but there was always something. It was a strange feeling, this absence of even a token, but also exhilarating in that our worst fears are often nothing to be afraid of. I don't really celebrate Christmas anymore. I find it so far removed from peace and goodwill as to be oxymoronic. A friend worked on the distress lines in Toronto and told me this is the peak season for violence, mayhem and murders and both attempted and real suicides and alcohol poisonings.
So I batten down the hatches, light a candle or two, remember my loved ones, both past and present and cook myself a turkey with all the trimmings. I also carefully select those I visit. I am partial to the families that still believe in magic. And there are a few. And I visited these and shed some tears in private afterwards. Missing my own. Intensely.
But also appreciative of my life, alone or with others. It is always my choice and how wonderful is that for a gregarious loner?
So no, this is not a pity pot post. Just a reflection on my life and the wee bits of growth and evolution I have had on my journey. A wise shaman said to me one time: Happiness is a direct result of the subtraction of stuff.
So I was alone. But not lonely.
Merry Christmas, WWW. You are a gift.
ReplyDeleteDear Wisewebwoman, I only just came across your writing and I felt something stir, somewhere deep inside. I noticed the rss feed but is there any way you could add a "follow" or "email subscription"? I will check back here regularly but I just thought I'd ask. Thank you <3 for sharing <3
ReplyDeleteMe too. I find it a very short day and am totally comfortable by myself.
ReplyDeleteI kind of stopped celebrating myself...visit with the grandaughters for a few hours and that's that. I totally get what you are saying
ReplyDeleteTo be able to be alone but not lonely is a great gift. I hope I will manage that in the years to come. I will not always have my daughter close by. You are a strong woman, WWW. I will try to be like you.
ReplyDeleteGreta Garbo has been misquoted for years. She never said "I want to be alone." She said "I want to be left alone." If you're curious, you're never alone, and definitely never lonely.
ReplyDeleteI think the point of Christmas is to keep us distracted so the darkest days of the year go by quickly.
ReplyDeleteI send cards to friends and family, gifts of money which is always appreciated, and help my elderly in laws get through their rituals. it snowed here which was pretty.
One doesn't need to live alone to feel the way you do. My father and my son live with me and I still believe that I enjoy my solitude as each of us is busy with his own space in the world. I could live alone all by myself. In fact, I have done so on more than a few occasions without any adverse developments. It is indeed wisdom to realise what you have!
ReplyDeleteWonderful reflection on the true meaning of Christmas.
ReplyDeleteHave a Happy New Year and maybe a drink of bubbly!
I'm sure you were in the warm thoughts of many WWW - your sweet Grandgirl for one; and do I see Ansa pouting now ( a little)
ReplyDelete;-) "your're never alone with me around" she's muttering.
Happy, peaceful New Year, when it comes, dear WWW !
From one gregarious loner to another: Happy New Year, with or without (or maybe in spite of) other people.
ReplyDeleteHow wonderfully liberating to wake up Christmas morning and have nothing to open. A true letting go of the hypocracy at this time.
ReplyDeleteI love the shaman's saying "happiness is a direct result of the subtraction of stuff".
I'm a bit of a lurker usually on your site and do appreciate your "gold nuggets".
The greatest gift...to be alone but not lonely! Happy New Year!
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