Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Thing Is.....


~~~~The eyes of Ansa can take my breath away~~~~

online life takes a chunk of my days. Maybe not yours. But certainly mine. Some can make a living at this. Others not.
Then there are people like me who partake in the etherlife for the sheer pleasure and enjoyment of it all. Not to mention the fellowship, the kindred-spirit-club membership of it.

I took the time off to write, to finish a novel started far too long ago (along with one finished, another half finished and a book of short stories, completed).

It's not so much the getting published and making millions, ha. It's the wrapping up. The freeing of the imagination for other endeavours like a couple of plays. Or even another book. I feel so many nested within me.

But getting down to the writing all day, every day. What a challenge!! I had all my meals pre-cooked and frozen. My phone was barely used with a message telling people to call back in March, message on FB, on blog and on emails. No visitors to the house - stay away. Let me do this.

Without any distractions, devils start dancing, unbidden old memories surface and strangulate. Depression skulks around the corridors of the brain, old, old templates form on the edges of reality and point wizened fingers behind the eyeballs, I won't repeat them here as their harsh roots may take hold one more time.

The time off yielded more despair than delight, more sads than happies, more unforgiving ghosts than amiable friends.

Would I do it again? Hell, yeah.

But I missed you guys.

And now I'm off to visit the lot of ye now.

20 comments:

  1. I am always impressed by people who write books. so wish I could do it.

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  2. I wrote a comment and it disappeared.
    Welcome back
    you have been missed by one
    who is trying to simplify
    and not doing too good at at.
    Yes, my addiction to online friends
    takes a big chunk out of my days,
    but would have it no other way.
    Take care...

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  3. It's always an interesting experiment to cut loose from the world for a while - especially the highly addictive internet. So you learnt something from the despair and sadnesses, even though they weren't what you expected? Good that you finished the long-started novel....

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  4. I think you were courageous to cut yourself off from the world and to only be in the company of yourself. Yes, that is when we do also face our demons. In a way it must have been like going a little mad. I imagine that is what I would have felt, but from madness great things come. I am glad you are back because I missed you.
    xox

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  5. Missed you too! Glad you're back. We'll do our best to fend off those demons for you---but maybe you could give us an excerpt---to whet our appetites!

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  6. Welcome back, glad your tome was so productive. Maybe a novel about the demons would help to put them to bed, once and for all.

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  7. I was interested by your remark about getting published. Since I retired two and a half years ago, I've written a novel, seven chapters of a second, a nonfiction book about how I handled retirement finances, most of a memoir, dozens of poems, and started a blog, none of it with an eye to being published. i wrote and edited for a livnig. Now I'm doing it for me.

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  8. Welcome back. I missed you too. And now that I know what you went through, I stand up and salute you. I would never be able to do anything like that if my life depended on it. I just don't have that kind of discipline.

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  9. Mel:

    Well all I can say is *start*. There is a book in all of us.

    XO
    WWW

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  10. OWJ:

    Thank you! My online friends mean so much to me. I've been fortunate to "meat" a few also and there is instant connection. Extraordinary.

    XO
    WWW

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  11. Nick:

    With no distractions, the journey is solely to self and that can be very intimidating. I was literally frightened at times. Particularly with no one to share it.

    XO
    WWW

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  12. Irene:
    You well and truly nailed it. Madness is where it was. I felt I was going insane as fantasy became more real as the days went by and not good fantasy at all. Strange and eerie and quite heavy.
    A few years ago I would have run for some sedative or other (booze pills cigarettes) so bearing it stark naked I wouldn't recommend to many.
    XO
    WWW

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  13. Molly
    I was thinking of offering a sampling particularly of a piece of this I read to a salon back in October.
    Watch this space :)
    XO
    WWW

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  14. GM:
    Ah I've tried writing of the demons, I will adopt them if they ever get a little friendlier!!
    good to be back :)
    XO
    WWW

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  15. Marc:
    I would be keen to read more of your work if you ever care to share it!
    I totally 'get' what you're saying.
    XO
    WWW

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  16. Ramana:
    I'm not that disciplined, I wish I were more would be divulged. I knew I had to do it as I am such an airy fairy webby person and need no distractions to be productive.

    I am so glad I am back too!!

    XO
    WWW

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  17. well dang it WWW i thought that you had gone to the Big Smoke for a visit.No matter,I still missed ya don't ya know?

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  18. GFB:

    You're warming the cockles of me heart me old son!!

    XO
    WWW

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  19. I'm a dollar short and a day late - but I missed you too. Welcome back !

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