Sunday, July 06, 2014

Variable Absolutes.


They drive me crazy. They're oxymoronic. They leave me speechless. They affect my inner peace. They ignite my old defect of judgementalism.

Examples:

Someone says over lunch the other day that they are on a gluten-free diet.

"Oh," I say, "that sandwich you're eating isn't gluten free."

"Except when I'm out or on vacation or don't want to offend someone," is the response.

"I never watch teevee," says a friend, as I sit in her living room with the flatscreen yelling at me to buy tampons/paper towels/a car.

"Then why is it on?" I ask, perplexed.

"I like the sound of it. I keep it on all day."

"I don't eat sugar, thank you." I say politely as a plate of muffins is proffered.

"This isn't really sugar."

"You baked sugar-free?"

"Oh no, I don't count sugar that's baked as real sugar."

"I see you out on the roads there, you take this training seriously?" says a friend observing my Tely 10 training.

"Well yes, it is a 10 miler (16 K) so I have to if I want to complete it."

"I should do it too, I can do 10 miles easy-peasy."

"Oh, you're training too?"

"I don't have to, I do all this housework and cooking and laundry and gardening every day."





26 comments:

  1. M:

    It's called lying to yourself. I'm afraid we all do it, to some extent.
    It's the first cousin to,"If I had bought IBM stock in 1947, I'd be rich today," or,

    "If I had stayed in college, I would have earned my doctorate," or,

    "If pigs had wings, they'd fly."

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  2. Good one WWW ! There are a lot more folks of that type than one might think.
    Now, if only my parents had given me a computer when I was six years old today I would be the worlds best blogger.

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  3. Yes, Marc, the self-deception can be huge in people.

    I've done it myself - "I only drink on weekends", etc.

    But seriously, as we get older, shouldn't the truth hit us in the face a little more often?

    Erm, scratch that last.

    XO
    WWW

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  4. GFB:

    I truly would love to see that computer you're talking about, it would fill a barn ++

    XO
    WWW

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  5. I remember laying onto a fellow grad student who said he was "mostly" a vegetarian. I asked him about that and he said he tried to only eat meat once a day. At the time, I ate meat but I said he NOT mostly a vegetarian. That I didn't consider myself any sort of vegetarian and I didn't even eat meat every day. Dope.

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  6. I don't have TV, but when I visit some houses it is left on and one lady flicks constantly from station to station muttering that there is nothing worth watching. How does she know, since she never leaves any one programme on for more than a minute. I don't stay long!

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  7. SAW:

    Yes and the occasional "vegan" too, who eat fish. Seriously!

    XO
    WWW

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  8. GM:

    I'm just gobsmacked she actually changes channels while you're there!!

    XO
    WWW

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  9. Ee, there's nowt so queer as folk and your lot had me laughing.

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  10. I don't like people who say "never" and "always." It will usually make a liar out of you to make those claims. It is better to say that you try to be or do something. Or to use the words "hardly ever." Absolutes are not so good. It smells to much of fascism.

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  11. Yep....ABSOLUTES are ABSOLUTELY no good!!! LOL LOL LOL LOL (oops)

    xo

    Jo

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  12. An excellent observation, WWW. Sometimes these extravagant claims followed by rapid backtracking and qualification can be amusing, but just as often they exasperate. I guess people go in for them so much because it's part of their myth-making, and they've invested more in comforting untruths than honest appraisal.

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  13. I for one think each and every one of us should get up in the morning and go to work. Work gives meaning to our life, and etc.
    (the geezer having written this leans back in his recliner, sipping his second cup of coffee, his slippered feet relaxed on the ottoman. He scratches his uncombed hair, looks idly at the hole in his tee shirt and yawns. Monday, he thinks, I'll take a nap later...)

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  14. I think there is a lot to be said for laying off oneself.

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  15. Too true, which makes it all the funnier. Your observations of human behavior are uncanny.

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  16. Pamela:

    You are *absolutely* correct my dear :)

    XO
    WWW

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  17. Irene:

    Yes, I'll scream "fascism" at the next one who lobs an absolute at me :)

    XO
    WWW

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  18. Stan:

    I do believe you nailed it. More comfortable with their lies to themselves :)

    XO
    WWW

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  19. SFM:

    A lifestyle I aspire to where I can dispense bon mots to my heart's content :)

    XO
    WWW

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  20. I know, the constant hypocrisy and self-deception people come out with is staggering. And of course I do it as well. We all like to think we're a bit more disciplined and sensible than we really are. Or more open-minded and tolerant than we really are. I'm genuinely vegetarian though and have been since 1975. I never ever eat meat or fish.

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  21. I once was told by a Sales Manager under who I was a rookie salesman, "Give them facts. They don't have to be facts, but give them facts."

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  22. Nick:

    Ah, an absolute. I knew there would be one out there :)

    XO
    WWW

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