Thank you all for your lovely words of support on my last post. I found this on line and it spoke to me so deeply I thought to share it with all of you who have suffered similarly.
On those days when you miss someone the most, as though your memories are sharp enough to slice through skin and bone, remember how they loved you.
Remember how they loved you and do that, for yourself.
In their name, in their honour.
Love yourself, as they loved you.
They would like that.
On those days when you miss someone the most,
love yourself harder.
Author : Donna Ashworth
That makes a heap of sense. Just the same, I find it hard to like myself let alone love myself. It goes against everything I was taught and that lesson at least has well and truly stuck.
ReplyDeleteI hear you EC, me too, it was taught as "sinful" in Ireland and linked to vanity. I find I can remember how I was loved and remind myself of that which helps enormously.
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That's nice and reminds me that I was taught differently to EC; I learned you cannot love others if you hate yourself, so love yourself first. But not in a "I'm the best and you should all kowtow before me" way. More along the lines of accepting who and what you are and knowing that everyone else is just doing the same. Isn't there a line in the bible (which I have never read) that says "love thy neighbour as thyself"?
ReplyDeleteYou were very fortunate River and learning from a different knee than mine. I'm getting a little better at it and reminders are so welcome always in the self-care rules of life.
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What a lovely poem. We should all take that to heart. ❤️
ReplyDeleteTotally Jean, I am working on it!
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Nothing more to say than, nice.
ReplyDeleteIt's very sweet Andrew and remembering how we were loved is so helpful. Oddly enough I think of how my last dog loved me. How her face would light up when she saw me and it reminds me of the person that my dog saw. I want to be that person 😉
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Wisdom
ReplyDeleteTotally. I need to work harder at it.
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It’s pretty sound advice.
ReplyDeleteYes, it's pretty solid David.
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Love ... the hardest answer to so many problem. And I too was taught to love others as yourself from a "biblical" person. No more, but certainly also no less. This made a heap of sense to me as a young one, still does, even if it's harder as I grow u and see all the dark spots in us all. But we are loved, and we have to love as an answer - reciprocating. Off this is hard to express in English. hope you understand.
ReplyDeleteI remember one time the wisdom of a guru saying the biggest test of empathy is to be kind to those who are unkind. It's easier to be kind to those who are kind. But those who need it most......I've had to work with that a few times recently. No expectations on others to change but kindness offered. So you make a whole pile of sense Charlotte.
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Thank you for the poem. I will be passing it along to Scott in the coming days, as we and other family members are keeping vigil at his younger sister's bedside in a Saskatoon hospital.
ReplyDeleteOh I am so sorry to hear this. How terrible for all of you.
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I was shocked to hear a friend, a wise one, say that her son -- a young child -- had to earn her love. What??!! Raised Catholic, this is what she thought. Sad.
ReplyDeleteNot surprised as the Cacklicks have the strangest rules on love. Starting with earning the love of the mythical leader.
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I have been behind on bld-reading and missed your last post. I just read it, and oh how it touched me. There really is no explaining or understanding grief, it just is. I don't think there is such a thing as closure either. Grief is like River, sometimes smooth and even sparkling in the sun, other times raging dark and turbulent. We don't "get over it" we just get stronger and get on with it. After all, the alternative is stay in despair and that's not a food place.
ReplyDeleteSending my hugs and wishing you light, dear lady.
Thank you GS, Very unpredictable is this grief thing, it winds around in circles some days throwing up the ghosts of the past, other days one thinks it's over. No. It's never quite over. Never quite done with us.
DeleteNo despair is not a good place though sometimes it does call my name.
Hugs backatcha, GS, we can all use more hugs.
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