Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Aging (Dis)gracefully


I couldn't resist posting this, sent to me by a friend today......

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR
OWN AGE AND THINKING, SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD.
WELL.. YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE.
MY NAME IS ALICE SMITH AND I WAS SITTING IN THE
WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW
DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA, WHICH BORE HIS
FULL NAME.
SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED
BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL
CLASS SOME 30-ODD YEARS AGO.
COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON,
WAY BACK THEN? UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY
DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT.
THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED
FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE. AFTER
HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED
MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL.
"YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG," HE GLEAMED WITH
PRIDE.
"WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?" I ASKED.
HE ANSWERED , "IN 1975. WHY DO YOU ASK?"
"YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!", I EXCLAIMED.
HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD,
WRINKLED, FAT ASS, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT
SON-OF-A-BITCH ASKED, "WHAT DID YOU TEACH?"

12 comments:

  1. What a rotter! Hope all his teeth fall out.

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  2. H'mmm, he might look even prettier....

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  3. Hee hee!
    Good one, WWW.
    We always think we look better than our peers.

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  4. And I think we all have that bit of vanity in us....

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  5. (Tittering) - I recognise the feeling well.

    I especially feel affronted when
    it's taken for granted that I'm eligible for the senior admission fee or menu, or whatever, without being asked. I kid myself that it's because my husband, usually accompanying me, looks old enough -because of course, I don't! LOL. I dream on.

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  6. Hi there Wisewebwoman;

    My first time here, and i like what i see!

    This story reminded me of an incident down at the community kitchen... i was bopping around, helping the cook when i heard someone behind me say, "Gee, i hope i have as much energy as SHE does when i'm HER age!"

    I looked around to see who the old hag was they were talking about, and saw two teenagers standing there, smiling at ME.

    Confounded whippersnappers.

    anan

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  7. I actually think most of my friends my age look younger than me. And most of them tell me it's loads of crap, but I am at a state where I notice all those little changes you know, the loss of elasticity of skin, the slow healing cuts and scars that just wouldn't go away.
    I am like that though, I always think others are nicer, more beautiful, younger, more successful, smarter, more intelligent, knowledgable and the list goes on with more this more that. I admire sooooo many people, for their qualities much more abundant and better than mine (assuming I have any).
    I can't believe he said that to you, maybe he was just joking?

    @}---'---,----

    G XxxxoxxxX

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  8. I found you through Sparrow Chat and read quite a bit about pornography and violence to women. I also ran across this on Joss Whedon's site and thought you might be interested. http://whedonesque.com/comments/13271

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  9. Welcome Flimsy and I see you share my 'Sparrow' passion.
    Yes, I followed the link and read his take on the horrific femicide. How all women aren't gun-totin' feminasties is beyond me....

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  10. Welcome Anan:
    I loved your story. I still get a shock when I see myself unexpectedly reflected in a shop window. It takes me far too long to recognise myself....:>)

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  11. Welcome Twilight!
    One of my most favourites by far is when I get the wink from the waitress (always an older woman) who says: "I'll give you the Senior's Discount if you want". I am poised on the delicate trapeze of being affronted or delighted in the conspiracy......:>)

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  12. Oh Gaye:
    No it wasn't me.
    It was only a joke sent to me by a friend!
    And no one can give us self-esteem for after all it is the opinion we have of ourselves that is the most important of all. And to change our often inferior opinions entails a lot of work. I speak from experience....:>)
    XO
    WWW

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