Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Aging (Dis)gracefully


I couldn't resist posting this, sent to me by a friend today......

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN GUILTY OF LOOKING AT OTHERS YOUR
OWN AGE AND THINKING, SURELY I CAN'T LOOK THAT OLD.
WELL.. YOU'LL LOVE THIS ONE.
MY NAME IS ALICE SMITH AND I WAS SITTING IN THE
WAITING ROOM FOR MY FIRST APPOINTMENT WITH A NEW
DENTIST. I NOTICED HIS DDS DIPLOMA, WHICH BORE HIS
FULL NAME.
SUDDENLY, I REMEMBERED A TALL, HANDSOME, DARK-HAIRED
BOY WITH THE SAME NAME HAD BEEN IN MY HIGH SCHOOL
CLASS SOME 30-ODD YEARS AGO.
COULD HE BE THE SAME GUY THAT I HAD A SECRET CRUSH ON,
WAY BACK THEN? UPON SEEING HIM, HOWEVER, I QUICKLY
DISCARDED ANY SUCH THOUGHT.
THIS BALDING, GRAY-HAIRED MAN WITH THE DEEPLY LINED
FACE WAS WAY TOO OLD TO HAVE BEEN MY CLASSMATE. AFTER
HE EXAMINED MY TEETH, I ASKED HIM IF HE HAD ATTENDED
MORGAN PARK HIGH SCHOOL.
"YES. YES, I DID. I'M A MUSTANG," HE GLEAMED WITH
PRIDE.
"WHEN DID YOU GRADUATE?" I ASKED.
HE ANSWERED , "IN 1975. WHY DO YOU ASK?"
"YOU WERE IN MY CLASS!", I EXCLAIMED.
HE LOOKED AT ME CLOSELY. THEN, THAT UGLY, OLD, BALD,
WRINKLED, FAT ASS, GRAY-HAIRED, DECREPIT
SON-OF-A-BITCH ASKED, "WHAT DID YOU TEACH?"

12 comments:

  1. What a rotter! Hope all his teeth fall out.

    ReplyDelete
  2. H'mmm, he might look even prettier....

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hee hee!
    Good one, WWW.
    We always think we look better than our peers.

    ReplyDelete
  4. And I think we all have that bit of vanity in us....

    ReplyDelete
  5. (Tittering) - I recognise the feeling well.

    I especially feel affronted when
    it's taken for granted that I'm eligible for the senior admission fee or menu, or whatever, without being asked. I kid myself that it's because my husband, usually accompanying me, looks old enough -because of course, I don't! LOL. I dream on.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi there Wisewebwoman;

    My first time here, and i like what i see!

    This story reminded me of an incident down at the community kitchen... i was bopping around, helping the cook when i heard someone behind me say, "Gee, i hope i have as much energy as SHE does when i'm HER age!"

    I looked around to see who the old hag was they were talking about, and saw two teenagers standing there, smiling at ME.

    Confounded whippersnappers.

    anan

    ReplyDelete
  7. I actually think most of my friends my age look younger than me. And most of them tell me it's loads of crap, but I am at a state where I notice all those little changes you know, the loss of elasticity of skin, the slow healing cuts and scars that just wouldn't go away.
    I am like that though, I always think others are nicer, more beautiful, younger, more successful, smarter, more intelligent, knowledgable and the list goes on with more this more that. I admire sooooo many people, for their qualities much more abundant and better than mine (assuming I have any).
    I can't believe he said that to you, maybe he was just joking?

    @}---'---,----

    G XxxxoxxxX

    ReplyDelete
  8. I found you through Sparrow Chat and read quite a bit about pornography and violence to women. I also ran across this on Joss Whedon's site and thought you might be interested. http://whedonesque.com/comments/13271

    ReplyDelete
  9. Welcome Flimsy and I see you share my 'Sparrow' passion.
    Yes, I followed the link and read his take on the horrific femicide. How all women aren't gun-totin' feminasties is beyond me....

    ReplyDelete
  10. Welcome Anan:
    I loved your story. I still get a shock when I see myself unexpectedly reflected in a shop window. It takes me far too long to recognise myself....:>)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Welcome Twilight!
    One of my most favourites by far is when I get the wink from the waitress (always an older woman) who says: "I'll give you the Senior's Discount if you want". I am poised on the delicate trapeze of being affronted or delighted in the conspiracy......:>)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh Gaye:
    No it wasn't me.
    It was only a joke sent to me by a friend!
    And no one can give us self-esteem for after all it is the opinion we have of ourselves that is the most important of all. And to change our often inferior opinions entails a lot of work. I speak from experience....:>)
    XO
    WWW

    ReplyDelete

Comments are welcome. Anonymous comments will be deleted unread.

Email me at wisewebwomanatgmaildotcom if you're having trouble.