My dear young friend had another catastrophe befall her which took me a fair distance from gratitude.
Her father's best friend assaulted and tried to rape her in the woods.
And her father did nothing. His BFF is back in his house as if nothing happened.
Her mother, as usual, is stoned out of her mind on pharmaceuticals.
We are moving heaven on earth to get her out of there and into assisted housing.
Sometimes life just sucks the bag and it's so hard to find the little diamonds underneath all the coal.
My missing daughter's birthday is tomorrow and this is always a rough time for me.
I spent the morning at the hospital with my vascular evaluation and that's not looking good.
So here you go:
Gratitude are my friends who are solidly there, all the time: supportive and loving in so many different ways I cry when I think of them. I'm not fit, as we say right now, and their arms and hugs reach out and hold me closely and cook me supper and listen as I cry and try and make sense of the world that would hurt my wee friend so deeply. And my missing child who could be? Not hide nor hair of her can be found. I just can't dig deeper. I don't want to know. It would be too much.
And Daughter is having challenges with her new job. Her MS is rearing its ugly head after a long nap and badly affecting her, poor pet.
But yes, if you're reading this, it's still this side of the daisies for all of us. The weather is kind. The bay smooth as a mirror, Grandmother Moon watchful and alert over it all. But puzzling. As I am.
As 2017 looms large on our horizons.
OH I wish daughter didn't have to work. The stress is not good for her.
ReplyDeleteHope your vascular workup will be as negative as mine was and that you can all find some way to help your little friend.
Negative in med speak, meaning they find nothing relevant.
DeleteOne of my concerns Anon is that the pain is worsening. I try not to throw myself into the pit of despair though it's at my feet today.
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I instinctively cried out "Good Lord!" when I read the second paragraph and as I continued, I couldn't help feel like somehow reaching out to you till I came to the end when I said to myself that "she is one tough nut". All the best.
ReplyDeleteNo not feeling too tough at all Ramana. I crawled back to bed around 11. My appetite has vanished (a rare event) and I lay under the covers for 2 hours feeling terrified and alone.
DeleteTruth.
Now I'm dressed and knowing I'll be safe and supported with close friends tonight.
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Hugs to to and your friend. I hope she can leave soon and find a healthier place to live.
ReplyDeleteOh gawd E me too. I did offer her a place here in the meantime. Which is hard for me as I'm such a loner but needs must.
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Some men are pigs. And the men who protect them are pigs too. Good to know you're helping her to escape from an intolerable situation.
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear of your latest medical problems. I hope you can find some positive way forward.
It's bigger than that Nick as you know. Women have always and still are for the use and abuse of men. We only have to look at the porn industry and prostitution and how that affects perception.no value and no respect. If I could repeat what this man said to her as he pinned her against a tree. He did not see her as the person he knew from babyhood on. Only porn words.
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All of that makes my 29-below sound like a paradise of ease. What a terrible thing for your friend ... how you must long for your missing daughter and worry about the other one ... and anxiety about your own health on top of it. Hang in there girl, better days have to come! - Kate
ReplyDeleteYes. The dark days always bloom into light. Today is particularly dark. Thank you for your thoughts Kate.
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I wish I could offer help; I will be thinking of you, though, and your daughters and your young friend. What a difficult situation; she is lucky to have you. May we all have such a friend.♣
ReplyDeleteWe learn from our friends who have carried us along the way Elle, paying it forward. So grateful to be of help to others when I can :)
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WWW I have looked around for where to email you, with my one partly functioning eye and don't see it so will post here, knowing you will jettison if you feel like it so there.
ReplyDeleteI think this information might be pertinent to you. Sore feet is one of the signs of a carbohydrate induced Diabetes 2. https://www.dietdoctor.com/hey-ireland-80s-called-want-dietary-advice-back
Thank you so much for your concern Anon. I am diagnosed.
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First, thank you for the kind comment on my sharing. Finally accepting all is not like it use to be and going forward.
ReplyDeleteMy heart aches for you this early morning and I do know
when you know exactly what is going on in your body you do
move forward. The unknowing is Hell. So thinking of you
with warm and healing thoughts and take care of yourself
or there will be nothing else to give others.
Thank you my dear friend Ernestine. I will soon get to the bottom of all this health schtick. It bores me, truly, I will move forward when I know. This old dog does not lie down!
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Sending heart felt thoughts for strength as you face so much. Gratitude can be hard sometimes but it will come again soon. A big thank you for your blog. I enjoy hearing about where you live and where you came from. I enjoy your wonderful way with words. You have enriched many lives including that of your new friend. Take care.
ReplyDeleteHow very kind of you Mary, thank you. REaders like you propel me onward even though the writing muse seems to have deserted me!
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I've been up and down too and suffering from loss of appetite, also practically unknown to me. I am so sorry about that poor young woman. Porn is ruining the young men.
ReplyDeleteBut as you say, we're still here. I do hope your missing daughter can be induced to contact you. Does your other daughter know where she is? Can she at least tell you whether she is OK?
Thank you Hattie, and I hope you feel better soon. YD has vanished Hattie no one can track her, we believe she may have changed her name. she knows how to find us so technically, like my grief counsellor has told me - we are dead to her.
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Just checking in here to see how you are...
ReplyDeleteThank you E, was slumping but now crawling out from under. Bad, bad month for me.
DeleteHugs.
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Dear Mary. I'm so sorry that you're down because your musings and writings lift me so much.
ReplyDeleteHow can we buy your picture cards, please? I've looked and looked (vida supra) but cannot find a link.
please I would like to buy some of your cards too. Your photos are beautiful.
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Could you guys email me wisewebwomanatgmaildotcom and I will send you more details? Thank you so much for your support and interest!
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Please accept my support from afar. And I'm glad to see you still have a sense of humor, with your "this side of the daisies" comment.
ReplyDeleteThanks Tom, boy I jinxed everything with my gratitude days, LOL.
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