I don't really know what I'm writing about here, I'll just go with my own flow. I could transcribe my hand written journal but I'm afraid you'd completely snore off before reaching the end of a couple of sentences.
I am seeing all these pics of my five siblings in Ireland and feeling quite sad and yes, my old friend The Black Dog lurks in the undergrowth of my mind.
WhatsApp and Zoom keeps us all together and I can see my sick brother being taken out and about to old spots and it was a big thrill to see the photo of my four brothers today. I can't remember the last time a photo was taken of the four of them as they live in three different countries.
All this to say with incredible heat and humidity and yes, loneliness for family, I need a fainting couch and some smelling salts. I have always hated heat and time in the tropics has been wasted on me. I have never understood the concept of wintering in the sunnier climes like Florida and Arizona. I thrive in the cold, not the heat. And this 95% humidity does my head in. One of the reasons I moved here was to escape the viciousness of Ontario summers. But climate change has caught up with Newfoundland. An island not equipped for heat.
So I've accomplished nothing in the last ten days. There's a huge cooling porch in my building but I would have to put on a nice face and engage socially which feels like a mountain I can't climb at the moment.
Thank you for writing this. I'm glad you're still in contact with our brothers, but I'm sorry about the weather in Newfoundland. I'm with you, I love winters and wither in heat.
ReplyDelete---Cheerful Monk
Good to hear another voice that despises heat!
DeleteXO
WWW
Life is ever so hard at times, your isolation from and and concern for family is understandable and if you didn't feel a deep sadness, that would be almost a pathology.
ReplyDeleteGetting to the harbour had to be a wee salve?
My very best energies are being sent
Thank you Kylie, yes being in touch all the time helps, but there's nothing like a physical presence.
DeleteXO
WWW
I am with you re the heat. It has been a miserable summer, not helped in my area by the lack of rain. Your longing for your family is palpable, but I suppose there is no way you can travel to Ireland to be with them? Sometimes it seems we must soldier on, but are left to wonder why. I will hope the black dog keeps his distance from you, and that cooler weather will soon come your way. Meantime, I lift my glass to you on this quiet Friday night and will imagine your glass raised in reply.
ReplyDeleteThank you GS, I have weighed the whole business of flying home in the last few years but the negatives far outweigh the positives as my health is so uncertain and my physical limitations would impact on far too many. I raise a glass to you!
DeleteXO
WWW
Add me to those who become sad, soggy and grumpy in the heat. I am relishing our winter (though it is warmer than winters gone by).
ReplyDeletekylie is right - which doesn't help or ease any of the pain. Huge hugs.
Inertia looms like a dark cloud over the hot mess I become in this appalling humidity. A whiny mess.
DeleteXO
WWW
95% humidity would do me in too, dry heat is easier though it does take me a while to become accustomed to summer these days. Can you frame the photos and put them where you see them every day?
ReplyDeleteYes, I agree the heat is bad but the humidity is the absolute worst!
DeleteYes, I printed off the pic of the 4 brothers.
I don't know yet whether it makes me feel better or worse.
XO
WWW
I could cope with cold and less so heat when I was young, but I think now I feel the cold worse. It has been a while since we have had a very hot summer, but ours is usually dry heat, much easier to cope with. I was surprised at the lack of cooling in Canada, as it was pretty hot when we were there and I think that was May. It must be hard for you to be so far away and clearly unable to visit your brother or be there with your other brothers. Try to appreciate the communication the internet has given you, although that may not even be a better thing. I'm starting to ramble, sorry. I am not going to even guess why JK Rowling's yacht is in your waters.
ReplyDeleteI'm so grateful for technology Andrew in so many ways, especially family but filtering down to my business life as well. Some clients I have never met in real life for example.
DeleteIn the last few days I find it hard to uncover slivers of joy which usually sustain me.
But this too shall pass.
XO
WWW
Missing family can certainly make one feel down and the hot weather doesn't help at all. Thanks to the wonders of technology at least you can all keep in contact, which is much better than years ago. I am also more fond of cool than hot weather and humidity tends to make me cranky as my husband often tells me (and he is right!). I hope that all your family and yourself are OK. The yacht is certainly a big one andI too was curious about it being in your area.
ReplyDeleteMore and more yachts and cruise ships are rolling in here now Beatrice. For instance, my Irish publishers, now retired, are sailing in here in August and we will have a meetup. Last time was in Dublin ten years ago. It seems to be on everyone's list after Come From Away, the musical about Newfoundland, was a global hit.
DeleteXO
WWW
Add me to the cool-weather people. This summer has been SO HOT with unbearable humidity to boot so am desperately looking forward to cooler and less-cranky days. At least we're this far along in the season and there are wonderful fruit varieties to enjoy only in the summer, so that's something. I can't help but wonder how a person would want a yacht that size! There's so much money everywhere anymore.
ReplyDeleteI believe they need to be big if they're cruising the oceans and well, crew, lol. Yes, cooler days ahead I hope Marge, this is interminable.
DeleteXO
WWW
We had a week of hundred degrees weather, and then some days in the eighties. Then hot again, then cooler. I dunno.
ReplyDeleteIt's crazy Joanne, a bit cooler here today but still sluggish, it's hard to move or think.
DeleteXO
WWW
I used to love the heat, but not now.
ReplyDeleteI think I have become inured to missing family, as so many have fallen out with each other. Or have moved on to their grandchildren.
I am happy in my little cocoon.
I was like that for a while with family crap but we managed to heal through Covid and the initiation of a weekly Zoom with sibs only. Massively healing.
DeleteThe greatest gift I gave myself was moving to Newfoundland though I have to say I adored living in Toronto, every aspect of it.
XO
WWW
I love seasons. Snow in the wintertime, widy for autumn, showers and fog in spring and sunshine in the summer. I cannot stand the mish-mash we have nw with overcast, rainy and dreary almost every day. Dang that global heating - which for us works like this: hotter, wetter winters; cooler, wetter summers; Urgh!
ReplyDeleteBut that said I feel with you, too hot and too humid is a killer-combo.
It's so good that those digital media exist to keep us connected to friends and family. It's a blessing, really!
And blogmates are a blessing too Charlotte. I have been blessed with knowing so many and grieving deeply when they fell off the blogworld. The weather sucks indeed. Everywhere.
DeleteXO
WWW
Like you, I don't like excessive heat or humidity. Not that we're getting much of either at the moment, it's been a miserable summer so far. As you say, What's App and Zoom have made it so much easier to keep in touch with family and friends. And yes, J K Rowling's yacht does look incredibly big.
ReplyDeleteI think the south has fared better according to my family anyway.
DeleteXO
WWW
It was 90 degrees with 90 percent humidity earlier and I cannot venture out for too long for fear of heat stroke. I'm glad you have got to see your brothers.
ReplyDeleteOh that sounds terrible e, I had to work in Florida one summer and it was brutal. But up here we're joining that club now with climate change.
DeleteXO
WWW
I've started to hate hot weather and hot humid weather makes a mincemeat of me.
ReplyDeleteI'm not surprised you feel homesick for a country where the rain falls cool.
The schoolfriend with dementia that I visit and sit alongside, initiates each of our conversations and they go along strange and unexpected paths.
I relax in the visit, knowing I could never have such an interesting chat without her.
Sitting alongside but not questioning.
Sadly someone else visited her this week and reported back on the group chat that she seemed upset and cross, possibly because the visitor had come armed with photographs and what sounded like a quiz sheet of questions.
Sorry to unload Mary but I knew you'd get it
Totally get it YS, I always let L my darling friend lead the conversation and never questioned her on anything. She felt comfortable asking me about memories which always sounded fresh to her even though she'd ask me every time about the same ones. I got to relive them too. Each time. And seriously? I loved that. She has declined further now and her confusion as to time of day and where she is is very distressing (for her) so I had to suspend contact. Her mother travelled this route too, it gallopped at the end. Cruel effing disease.
DeleteXO
WWW
Stopping by to say hello and I hope that you've had some cooler days. I read your posts but haven't gotten out the laptop in a long time to post comments. I appreciate your honest reflections about friendship and family and loss. Such sharing has value in that we don't feel so alone. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteWelcome back Sharon, I'm with you. I have my PC and without that the screens on my other devices would be too small to engage with for writing.
DeleteThanks for your kind words.
XO
WWW