Inside Me

You know how that poem goes, don't know the author, it may not be even a poem but it has always resonated with me:

"Inside my winter there is an endless summer?"

or something like that.

I tailor such quotes to fit my own brain.

Well, inside me there is this 3 year old. She doesn't 'adult' well. I love how "adult" has now become a verb, much like many other words. I remember Grandgirl saying to me one time" "Oh Grandma, don't harsh my mellow". Loved the phrase, adapted it for my own use.

So I work madly on this 2,000 word article/essay request that came in, I loved the process, even the intense editing involved and I submitted it. And, and, and, the editorial team send me individual emails raving about it.

I mean what do real adults do when this kind of response is elicited? Sit quietly, I imagine and get cracking on their next oeuvre? Sounds very mature and responsible and grown-up, right?

Me? I race around the house and then out to the meadow a la Rocky pumping the fists and then I PM Daughter and Grandgirl. A humble brag. And then run around again, just for the hell of it.

Each time a piece of my writing is well received, I can't believe the feeling I get. That crayoning 3 year old escapes and races around in delirious excitement.

I observed similar in an author friend today who's been nominated for a major award. "57 congratulatory emails and climbing", he sez, "And I'm sitting outside a small convenience store at the edge of nowhere, syphoning their wifi, unable to leave in case I might miss another."

May this feeling never leave me, may it encourage me and sustain me.

Amen.

Dilemma

Revitalized School of Art in Cork, Ireland where I took classes in the Sixties

I knew the day would arrive and I anticipated that the road ahead would be clear. But it is as murky as ever.

Anonymity on the blog.

There are a load of you out there in full colour, names and identities in full disclosure. Some who have become friends over my blogyears know my name, of course. Others not. Because I am anonymous I've written about some highly personal stuff. Friendships, relationships, my village, my hometown, my exes, my children, et al. If I were to go public I would have to cull the whole blog. Approximately 800 entries at this point in time. Probably a whittling to half, an onerous task. Or I could start afresh.

This has all come to a head with the play, you see, and then when I was in a shop away from here yesterday and there, on display, was the official calendar of the huge peninsula - voted #1 Coastal destination in the world by National Geographic and in which I reside. The calendar features one of my photos - month of August 2012,thanks for asking. And there is other creative stuff down the pike where the blog publicity would greatly assist (I would think) apart from keeping my blog buddies updated.

I know many of you don't feel the need (or have the compulsion) to blog personally but I find that even though I have other blogs, this is the only one I seem to be able to manage and update on a fairly regular basis. One is my limit. Even though I have the occasional illusion that I can manage 3. Ha.

Have any of you out there resolved this to your satisfaction, i.e. breaking anonymity to write of creative endeavours and how did you manage this? Or even advice as to the best method, etc.?

I appreciate you all so much and this blog and its wonderful readers in no small way has enabled my current success.