I've let go of a few ongoing commitments and involvements lately. I found so much of my time was sucked into reading the multiple different group chats, the organization of duties, the learning curve of new skills (in one case, hello sound engineering!) that there was no longer any enjoyment in any of it. I felt pressure and stress and my attention was scattered and completely unfocussed.
I also suffered from an ongoing resentment against myself for in my desire to keep stimulated and involved neither was happening.
Sometimes the need for evaluation of time spent needs to be thoroughly examined. Which I did.
As I age I am discovering that decisions need to be made quickly. How the hell do I know what time I have left?
So I dropped three outside involvements in my life. Without any regrets. And no agonizing. Clean, clear.
I'm now dedicating time to things that motivate me further, like my book launch tomorrow which is thrilling me no end as I put together a playlist for the background music, a draw for a free book, intros of the presenters and readers, my wee talk beforehand, the greeting of old friends, the chat, the gratitude, my own reading.
Orders are exceeding all expectations and we're going into a second printing and scheduling more signings around the city.
Life is good.
What's been your experiences with letting go and moving on?
Congratulations on that second printing! Have fun at the launch. Wish I lived closer.
ReplyDeleteFor me, letting go and moving on only came with closing a mental door on something; accepting that it was over. Until I did that, I'd be ruminating, rehashing, and continuing to try to create something that wasn't happening as I wanted it to. My mind would go in circles, desperate almost. It never got me anywhere but disappointed and stressed. It's hard to let go, isn't it? -Kate
Very difficult and it often can be strangled by outside perception of our self-care policy.
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Where can I buy your book?
ReplyDeleteYou can get it on Amazon Sharyn, just search for Write Around the Bay or I can mail you a copy for $25.00 postage and tax included.
DeleteEmail your address wisewebwomanatgmaildotcom
Tx my friend.
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I'll get it from Amazon so you don't have to send it internationally. I just looked it up and added to my list!
ReplyDeleteThanks Sharyn, so much!
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Me too, WWW - I shall order your book from Amazon - have the page bookmarked now. :)
ReplyDeleteAs for moving on, I think the major experience for me was moving from the UK to the USA 14 years ago, while in my 60s. :-0
Thanks so much T. Yes, that was a big letting go. I was thinking more of the little ones that cross our paths every day. I see so much evidence around me of people clinging to old ideas or long expired relationships or associations, you know?
DeleteMy test is contentment at my age. Am I content? I want to answer yes for my remaining years.
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I seem to be always trying to let go. I am 75 and have to do it while I can still do other things. I announced to a board I am on that I was resigning at the end of the year and now I find myself with commitments to finish up a web site for same org. The one thing that will end soon is my commitment to local politics. I am canvassing today for the local progressive candidate and, at this time, I feel we have to do all we can. Hopefully I can say no more often in 2019. Contentment - a good goal.
ReplyDeleteGood luck Mary. I too had to resign from a board as it was eating at my time. Also activism. My activism is now fairly self-centred and that can be a good thing. Though I admit to keyboard activism still and tweeting in support of the calling out of the havoc and horror I see around me.
DeletePracticing "NO" is tough.
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Good luck with the book event, and I am glad your book has gone into a second printing. As for me, I just take it easy and try not to rush around so much.
ReplyDeleteYes, I agree, I was a mad rusher in my time. No more. Though I still maintain punctuality which to me has always meant respect - both for myself and others.
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Agree, it’s good to re-evaluate our priorities now and then to make sure we’re focusing our time on what’s important to us. So best of luck on your launch of Write Around the Bay!
ReplyDeleteThank you Tom, it exceeded all expectations. I'm still riding on the thrill of it all.
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Our time we have left is ours . Claim it, plan some of it, enjoy not planning some of it...just the doing. Let it be joyous , fulfilling . Contentment is a wonderful feeling. It will make people wonder what you have found when they look at you and your life. Calm ,content, wistful.
ReplyDeleteGemma you described my status perfectly: calm, content, wistful and I would add "grateful" for the way I'm feeling today.
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Amazon is easy but do you make more money if we buy directly from you versus ordering via Amazon? I learned from a USA author that was the case but we are both in the same country so don't know if that makes a difference. Kim in PA
ReplyDeleteProbably direct is more money but it costs money to mail so your cost would increase :)
DeleteBut thank you Kim. And I still owe you a card and haven't forgotten.
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I'm getting much better at prioritizing and letting go of things that don't feel like a good use of my time or energy.
ReplyDeleteYes, SAW and you have a rattling good reason to let go. And I wish I'd learned my lessons earlier, than again they wouldn't be so appreciated as they are now.
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Congrats on your book’s second printing.
DeleteLetting go — of relationship’s unexpected enlightenment, interrupted resolution by sudden death. Letting go — of what became a digital obligation with a return to pleasure. Letting go — of anticipations for reality.
Thank you Joared. Yes letting go of loss is the worst challenge but it can be done with a refocussing and grateful remembrance of times past.
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Letting go can be hard. We always feel so obligated to fill every waking moment with something. Over the last couple of years I've been paring down quite successfully. I'm at the point now where I find myself doing exactly what I want to do with my time. Learning to say no without guilt can be hard but like everything else it gets easier with practice.
ReplyDeleteSo very true Judith, it's the practising that I need to do before even half-heartedly committing. My biggest problem is so many want a piece of me to get things done as I have a few skill sets that are needed and before I know it the complete project lands in my lap.
DeleteNO. NO. NO.
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By now you should have got a handle on my ability to let go and move on. I have been doing that successfully now for quite some time and have simplified my life to such an extent that I breathe better for it.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to fossilize myself either Ramana so I am selective in what I take on, it has to "spark joy" as the current flavour of the month tells us!
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What good news about your book! I've been recovering from a surgery and am behind on your news. Congratulations!
ReplyDeleteLinda let me know how you're doing please, and thank you!
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