I've had a series of tests to confirm that my blood is at dangerously low levels. Which means that I have internal bleeding of some kind.
Awaiting hospital and extensive testing to source.
I have absolutely zero energy but mercifully (without my asking again) I am prescribed better pain killers which means I am pain free but near collapsing most of the time. So I am extremely careful in movements.
My neighbor next door is on 2 hour watch with me, which means every two hours she texts me and if no response will call 911.
A shipment of iron pills just arrived so I will be on those until hospital confirm appointments and tests.
We are on Alert Level 5 here which means that no family member can attend me in hospital which is rather alarming. Plus risk of Covid on top of this.
But this is affirming, you know. I knew I was quite ill though at times I felt it was "all in my head" as I felt slightly ridiculous sitting down between minor tasks like brushing my hair or making breakfast in 4 steps. It's only when I wrote down all my symptoms (thanks to my loving Daughter) and read them all out to the doctor that he sounded the alarm bells.
Meanwhile my beloved coffee pot died and luckily I had an ancient up French press in my cupboard.
Gack, life without a good fresh ground dark roast would have been untenable right now.
Oh dear, well, if anything you now know that your terrible listlessness is not "in your head", you have better pain control and help is on the way. I hope you can get a hospital appt. for tests quite soon. My hubby had the same thing happen a few years back. These things can creep up on you so slowly it's imperceptible until... suddenly you're incapacitated! Hang in there and take comfort if you can that you are valued and beloved by many. <3
ReplyDeleteThank you EC, for those wonderful words of support and affirmation. My day has been very rough so far, struggling even to eat as no appetite and I scare myself in the mirror, I look like a ghost.
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I well remember the relief in learning that I had MS and wasn't a hypochondriac. I do hope that a cause and treatment can be found for you soon. VERY soon.
ReplyDeleteYes, the relief is immense EC, my inner voice was constantly "you sound like a lunatic" and my father's words who would dismiss every serious illness with "But this is normal." Normal for an old person, I told myself.
DeleteNothing normal about what is happening right now.
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I do hope you go to hospital soon and they can do something! Wow, this is terrible! I know what you mean about affirming though, As terrible as it is, it’s a relief of sorts to know you are not imagining or exaggerating. Good for Daughter. Fingers crossed that they find the problem and fix it!
ReplyDeleteMe too, Annie, in spite of the risky pandemic times as for sure I can't go on like this.
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I am hoping and praying that they will find the problem that is NOT in your head!
ReplyDeleteNo definitely not in my head and my 12 yo doc confirms this. But scary in these times to have something go so seriously wrong but it truly has been downhill for about a year now.
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So sorry to hear this. I will hold you in my thoughts for a good recovery.
ReplyDeleteThank you Sandra, all these good thoughts and love are sustaining me.
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You are quite sick and I hope you recover very soon. However, if you have to go to hospital, I wouldn't expect much in the way of good coffee. Take care.
ReplyDeleteYou always give me a chuckle Andrew, good coffee will be a distant memory. The swill in there I wouldn't call coffee.
DeleteAnd knowing my luck I'll be cut off from stimulants.
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I'm hoping fervently that they diagnose and fix you up asap.
ReplyDeleteMe too, Boud. Life like this is not any kind of picnic.
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Now you get to go through all the tests. How I hope they locate the bleed before you have to swallow the camera. And if you must, what the hey. Get that little sucker nipped, not in the bud, but certainly not in full bloom. So happy you have their attention.
ReplyDeleteThank you Joanne, the older I get the more difficult it is to sort out my symptoms and whole elder health is not supported by even one gerontologist in this province.
DeleteWe sure are a forgotten segment of the population and our health is unpredictable.
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This is quite alarming, unknown loss of blood and having to wait to get into a hospital to find out why. In my opinion, this sort of thing should have you tucked up in a nice warm room with machines that go "beep" right away. None of this waiting business. I am glad you finally got stronger pain medication though and the iron pills should help a bit until they find where you are bleeding from and put a bandaid on that. Of course the bandaid is tongue-in-cheek, I realise a more serious fix is in order.
ReplyDeleteWe're up against getting the best care in these uncertain times. I have a doctor who fights for me all the time, even in the case of expensive drugs so I know he will fight with the specialists for this and has emphasized the urgency of my diagnosis.
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Surely those words "in your head" are among the most detestable in the English language. Take it from someone with experience. I'm glad you are being taken seriously and the problem is being looked into. Hopefully you will get answers that make sense and guidance to handle whatever is discovered. I emailed you this morning. Now I know you had more serious business to take care of. Thinking of you, and wishing you the best. Rose in Texas
ReplyDeleteWill answer soon, Rose, and I keep thinking of Texas and climate change and privatizing power and water and all that entails when the plugs are pulled. Awful business with your governor evaporating to Mexico and then doing the walk of shame as he's hauled back. Horrible and mentally devastating. All the luck in the world. I am glad they're won't be paper towels thrown at your heads *joke* I hope you laugh even a little.
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While the diagnosis is alarming, it is indeed reassuring to know what is wrong and what can be done about it. The two hour watch seems an excellent idea. My best wishes that you quickly get over this patch too.
ReplyDeleteMe too Ramana, I hope us old nuts are hard to be put down.
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I send my best wishes for the information getting process to be soon done so you can get on with treatment.
ReplyDeleteSlightly scary stuff
Yes a little scary alright, Kylie, though just being on my feet seems to take most of my attention at the moment.
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Good wishes for treatment. Mentally at least you will feel better now that you are on a path of action. And what a lovely neighbor you have. Take care!
ReplyDeleteYes I am so fortunate with my neighbour, as I don't want to trouble my immediate family with this deterioration.
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Good news: It's not in your head. Bad news: It's bad.
ReplyDeleteI feel relieved and anxious for you at the same time and hope and pray that your wait will be short! Take care. Hugs from Denmark.
Thank you Charlotte, there's no getting away from the fact that bleeds are bad whatever the source.
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Hoping everything goes well and you can finally return to better health. Will be thinking of you and looking forward to your return home feeling so much better having this behind you. Warmest wishes for a speedy recovery. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThe unknown is always scary until it is known. I am hoping the diagnosis will be quick and I can take it from there.
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Internal bleeding is dangerous. I hope they can fix it. Take care of yourself. I'll keep you in my prayers and hope you will pull through this.
ReplyDeleteThank you Gigi.
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My dearest one, love and hugs and healing thoughts to you.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much GP, all this love has me quite overwhelmed and so very grateful.
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Coffee is great but I do hope you will get the treatment you need to get better.
ReplyDeleteMolly sometimes it helps to focus on the minor irritations which I allowed myself the luxury of when yelling at the coffee pot which was only about 3 years old. It helped.
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Well shit! I hope they get you in quickly and out just as quickly and safely. Get well xoxo Kate
ReplyDeleteThanks Kate.
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Thinking of you and sincerely hoping you are on the way to getting some answers asap. Holding you in the light~
ReplyDeleteHow lovely, thank you Sharon.
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Am also thinking of you tonight and hoping you get answers and treatment quickly. And glad that you had a backup for that coffee maker.
ReplyDeleteYes me too, it's a good thing sometimes to obsess about something and my new one will be delivered on Tuesday, hallelujah.
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Good that they've discovered the low blood levels and possible internal bleeding, and good that your various symptoms now make some sort of sense. Best of luck with all the tests.
ReplyDeleteYes, I am now on the recovery path I hope though Covid is really changing all of this. I don't know where I'll fit on the emergency list. I know I'm not alone in this.
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I have not been online much because we were caught up in the impact of Texas' storm: no water and power in 9-20 minute intervals. Your news is both affirming and scary, isn't it? When we're older, it's sometimes a fight to have people listen and not attribute everything to our age. Surrounding you by good thoughts and healing vibes, if that matters.
ReplyDeleteThank you Linda, so very sorry about your storm and the lack of preparedness and ignoring of climate change. Stay safe.
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In continuing to think about your situation, I wonder why in your dangerous condition your doctor hasn't suggested you go straight to the Emergency ward. We learned in all the recent runaround with Dad that if you want immediate treatment, going by ambulance transport gets you hooked up to an IV right quickly, and followup, whereas if you walk into Emergency you can sit there for many hours, waiting till someone gets around to you. Anyway I'm sure there are good reasons why he's left you waiting at home in a dangerous state, but I have questions! Hope you're okay and will keep us informed. xoxox Kate
ReplyDeleteKate I was resistant to that, the idea terrified me: being old, disabled and no family member allowed to accompany me. I didn't even have the energy to pack a small bag. You can say I was non compos mentis and I probably was. I was slowly going craze from this and even said to the doc I want to die. I can't go on living.
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Thinking of ypou, hoping you are okay.
ReplyDeleteThank you Gigi. Much, much better.
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Glad you found out what the issue is though I realize much more needs to be known. I do hope you get those additional tests soon, that you continue to manage in the meantime. Will be sending positive thoughts your way.
ReplyDeleteThank you Joared. I could feel all these positive vibes coming my way. I am crying with relief here on my 5th day on iron. And not so down and done with life.
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I hope your silence means that tests and answers are moving forward swiftly and will bring helpful answers. Although that would mean that you're currently alone in the hospital, know that so many of us have you on our minds and in our hearts.
ReplyDeleteThank you Linda, so far so not happening with tests but my relief is profound as to the iron kicking in, though it can take another few weeks before full benefits.
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Mary, my computer is finally letting me comment.
ReplyDeleteAgree about the need for daily ground coffee.
Do get well soon. xxx
Thank you Anne, I'm still awaiting my new coffee maker and do miss my fabulous large Krups left as part of the house effects when I sold it. Too huge for my tiny counters here :)
DeleteWe know our coffee!!!
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I hope this is sorted quickly...sending hugs.
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