I met with a dear friend for lunch yesterday to discuss all these crossroad changes I've been mulling. We're roughly the same age and have each other's backs from time to time as needed.
If I needed validation, I had to look no further. Her face lit up, she got completely excited and she burst out: "Oh my gawd, I can just see you here, oh my gawd, your wings can spread so wide here!"
It was flattering, sure. But she was also very down-to-earth in sharing her knowledge and expertise in the building she's in. I've been to her place for dinner but never "did the 5 star tour" and that's on the agenda soon. Meanwhile she's got the inside scoop on applications and references. It's an absolutely ideal spot for aging in place with support, minimum as it is, for tasks like twice weekly grocery shopping in a mini-van around the city for those who don't drive or have surrendered their licences. Free laundry facilities, a communal garden for planting, a covered patio area with BBQs and other etceteras to make life interesting. Many of the residents still work (she does) and community involvement is left with the individual tenant.
I am quite excited about this which tells me a lot. It may take months and months to activate the second step as there may be a waiting list, she's very well connected with the board of directors so private information will be delivered to me also.
I'll track the whole process here as I know a lot of my readers are on cusps of transition too, whether internal only or ready to make a bigger leap.
Good for you. It sounds like a good fit!
ReplyDeleteI haven't got my foot in the door yet E but at least the walk of a thousand miles starts with the first step....:)
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My mother lives on her own in a large house she can't cope with. She can't drive, she can't get to the shops, she won't take a bus or get a cab. She's totally reliant on other people doing everything for her. Usually me, with a little help from a lady in our church. She's in this situation because she never prepared for her old age. She put her head in the sand. She'll be 87 on Saturday. Good for you preparing for your future.
ReplyDeleteI know Joe, it is so tempting to just ostrich out but I can't. I've observed mothers like yours constantly whining about the gardens or hanging curtains or getting painting/shovelling/shopping done and its appalling as there is never enough done and no gratitude I could see. I sympathised so much with their adult children. And said to myself, no not me. Daughter is marvellous but she has a life to live and I feel if I plan life will be better for us all.
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Good on you missus for taking the first step. The adventure begins. I hope it will be an interesting journey and stress free!
ReplyDeleteMe to GM, I feel less stressed already with this action step. I'm hoping my health will improve.
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Deleted my comment
ReplyDeletemany errors :)
So proud of you
and probably what I may need to do
but my heart is in these woods I returned to 8 years ago
From our sharing
I believe I am much older then you
but with my pain and balance issue
I may have a mind problem not wanting to leave at this time.
I want my son to help me evaluate much
when he soon returns
My girls just say
"you are just fine"
not so and with their not frequent visits
they do not have a clear picture.
Seems with our conversations I sound fine
and write occasionally - but they have to be with me
more to realize the struggle going on.
Good luck in all you decide
I am so glad your son is coming and will help to clear your mind and move forward with your strength and health issues. You are certainly challenged Ernestine. You love your place like I love mine but sometimes the time comes when it would be better for you to make the decision than have it made for you.
DeleteI would love to see your life easier and not more difficult.
Thank you for you always kind thoughts.
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Above all else, it's great to have a dear friend to talk to, confide in, look to for advice.
ReplyDeleteAnd also the support. I know the decision is mine and mine alone, so very few know about it as I would have resign and/or terminate positions of trust and don't want the grapevine to sneak around and do it for me. Gossip is huge currency, unfortunately, out here on the Edge.
DeleteSo mum's the word.
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Is this place in the town where you live now?
ReplyDeleteNo SJG, it's in the nearest city.
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More than one substantial change coming up, then. I'm kinda envious!
DeleteSounds wonderful. I hope you get in and get in quickly.
ReplyDeleteThank you DKZ, I am hoping for the fall, if possible.
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Wow! This sounds an exciting new start! Can't wait to hear more.
ReplyDeleteMaggie x
Yes, Maggie I'll track the progress.
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Okay some inkling of what is likely to happen beginning to show. All the best.
ReplyDeleteBaby steps, we'll see, uncertainty is not my friend, LOL
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It's so important to be able to maintain your health, stay active and make new friends. This sounds like it might be a great solution. Once a big house becomes a burden it just drains the joy and energy from your life. But a young family might find it's just what they've been dreaming of, a win-win for everyone. {{{WWW}}}
ReplyDeleteFingers crossed for you.
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