Thursday, February 04, 2021

Update

 I had an unpleasant reaction to some new medication the doc prescribed. And I truly hate to say this but everything seems to be an uphill battle lately with, internally, myself screaming: not another effing hill to  climb.

Daughter was in and I just couldn't summon enough strength to go out to lunch with her so she brought some Indian curry in. A new Indian restaurant has opened on this side of the city and the food was delightful. Absolutely the best samosas I have eaten and the lamb curry was to die. A huge menu. Opening in a pandemic is quite gutsy.

A friend/neighbour had given me some pills she was using for her pain management and they also worked for me but doc refuses to prescribe and was enraged I had taken medication not prescribed. I hear him but I was desperate just to get some relief in walking across a room, just for a day. So he refused to prescribe them as I might get "addicted" or long range, they might lose their efficacy. I said the quality of my life was so badly effected that I would take anything at this point. And I was an old woman - what? did he think I was going to wind up under a bridge with a needle in my arm? No budge.

I was down though for lots of days and I am going to tackle him again. But I had to conserve my strength for CBC and the interview which went well, I thought.

If you wish to hear it, please email me at wisewebwoman at gmail dot com and I will send you the link. I wish to remain anonymous here as I write of everything from my personal journey to more political matters and I need to keep my oars in the water so to speak.

I keep counting the small things today to keep my spirits up. I'm reading a marvelous book called "The Guest Book". It's gripping. Thanks to whoever recommended it. And there's some great stuff on Britbox that holds my attention. One recently watched was "A Confession" with Martin Freeman, based on a true story.



20 comments:

  1. I'm sorry you've been in such bad pain. There are definitely times when you feel that the heavy duty meds should be allowed. I would think a good doctor would keep on top of your meds and be constantly working to keep you walking and talking. That's the deal I have with my doctor.

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    1. Thanks for this DKZ. You have been enormously helpful.

      XO
      WWW

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  2. Sadly I hear you. My doctor (soon to become my previous doctor) flatly refuses to prescribe pain killers because of the addiction question. Which is easy for him to talk about in a life not dominated by pain.
    I do hope that you can get a MUCH better result after your next interaction with him.
    And congratulations on the CBC interview. I do want to hear it and will send an email shortly.

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  3. Wow, that's bad. The doc should give you something ... there must be an option that's not addicting.

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  4. It sounds like the doctor just doesn't like being "undermined" by patients taking their own medicine. Does possible addiction really matter when it relieves chronic pain?

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  5. My mother at 87 battles with some medical people over her pain killer use, some expressing concern about her addiction. Others say, it is too late to be concerned about and trying to wean her off pain killers would do more harm than good.

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  6. ... and if you get addicted, so what? As long as he keeps prescribing the meds. If and when they stop working, you should be able handle this together. He's a nincompoop. Pains are the worst, you found something that worked, and with no adverse reactions. Heureka! He should be happy, maybe start you out on a lower dose or something, but so stupid not to want to help. That's actually what doctors are there for. Grrr, things like this make me angry.

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  7. I know medicine is "different" there, but can you find a doctor who manages pain? It's where I wound up, and it's a blessing.

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    1. I think Joanne has a good idea..a pain management doctor.
      Although, I know you like your team of doctors. Maybe you need another member of this team. :)

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  8. When your quality of life is so badly affected you can barely walk across a room, I would think any doctor might be a bit more caring and at least offer a decent substitute.

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  9. Do hope you are able to get some pain relief somehow. Life is miserable with pain and can be so limiting of activity. I've sent you an email to hear your CBC interview. Glad you were able to do it.

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  10. I am sorry to hear about your travails. I hope that you will revert to your old self very soon. My best wishes that you do. I shall email you.

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  11. Hey, I want Indian food NOW. Samosas and lamb curry sound delicious!

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  12. I hate that doctors act like gatekeepers, as if we old ladies have neither the ability nor the right to make decisions for ourselves on quality of life issues. My doc thinks I have a hypertension issue solely because it skyrockets every time I’m in her office, totally normal any other time. And it’s the gatekeeper thing that does me in, every time.

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  13. I’ve caught up with you after a long absence (on my part.) I am sorry to see that you are physically not in the very best shape, but ‘sharp as a tack’ you certainly are. Maybe doc can give you painkillers that are not addictive? Meds can become addictive quite quickly and once they are they are enormously hard to give up. It took me more than a year to free myself from tranqus and it was not pleasant.

    I love the posts on living a healthier life, well done for sticking it out.

    I’d also love to have the url for your interviews, but I doubt that they’d work over here.

    Best of luck, stay well, stay healthy, stay sane.

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  14. I heard your broadcast on the radio. It took me a while to realize that I had to click on the 7:04 number to get to your actual broadcast. Before that, I was wasting my time listening to the entire show wondering when you were going to show up. At any rate, you made such a wonderful point about the plight of seniors. One thing that struck me was the lack of dental insurance. If seniors have bad teeth, then they can't bite into an apple or chew a carrot, for instance, and that leads to a poor diet. That sounds like the poor dental care seniors get in the USA. Dentists are incredibly expensive, even with insurance. So, thanks for the link. I enjoyed the broadcast.

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  15. I ditto the suggestion about a pain management doctor. After failed back surgery led to never ending pain for my husband, our primary care doctor said, "the pain is boss!" He sent him to a pain management doc. On his first appointment, he received injections in his back. Blessed relief after months of suffering, That was in 2013. Since then, there is an appointment every month. He takes morphine and oxycodone daily. Sometimes the pain still overrides and he gets shots. He is almost 88 years old. What is the point of living if there is no quality of life? The danger of becoming addicted as we age is certainly not at the top of of the list of concerns. I wonder if there is a doctor in St. John's who specializes in pain medicine. Those doctors are scarce here near Dallas; I think because so much education is required. Maybe your daughter or gdaughter can look into that?

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  16. I understand about the opioid crisis, but good grief. There are times when those drugs are warranted. I would seriously consider a pain clinic if they have those there. There's no sense in just hurting.

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  17. Just put The Guest Book on hold at the library. Picking up books at the library has become the highlight of my week! Our building is closed; drive-through window pickup only is available. It is a godsend for me; books give me such joy. But I am amazed how much I miss just wandering around the stacks... My mom is going through a similar battle re: pain; has back and leg pain that is overwhelming at times. So frustrating getting her doctor to listen to how much her quality of life is affected. Next step for her: new doctor!

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  18. If you can't walk across the room comfortably, you stop walking across the room. You stop feeling up to tackling anything. You decline when you could still be feeling optimistic as you face each day. As unintended consequences of the new recommendations relating to opioids began to play out here in the US, I was dealing with a rare condition that caused horrific pain when I talked, ate, smiled or even walked and created a small "wind" in my face. I lost tremendous amounts of weight. I needed a cane to walk. Medical professionals started calling me "fragile." I couldn't brush my teeth without setting waves of horrific off, and others with my condition suffer the same things. It's impossible to believe a face could hurt as much as this hurts, but my blood pressure told the story, too: I suddenly needed three BP medications, with my cardiologist saying, "It's the pain! It's the pain!" For most of us with this condition, opioids don't work but for others, it was their bulwark. Anti-seizure meds help some of us; not all. I was among the lucky ones. A brain surgery--actually, two, because I subsequently developed the same issue on the other side--resolved my problem, but the surgery doesn't help all and leaves some with another horrific disorder: anesthesia doloroso. But opioids did help others, and all of a sudden, they found themselves cut off, cold turkey, a dangerous thing to do, or were subjected to their pharmacists yelling at them in front of other customers. They couldn't go to their local ERs because they were marked as drug seekers. Hearing the others' stories reminded me of when I was 25 and staying every day with my mother with terminal cancer, listening to her beg me at the two-hour mark for another morphine injection and having to explain I couldn't give it because then she'd run out before we could get her prescription refilled. Instead of upping her prescription as the cancer attacked bones, they took her off and put her on a methadone treatment which crushed her psychologically. There has to be a better balance. I don't know your health system. Are you able to consider a change of physicians?

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