Monday, May 07, 2018

The World I Live In

The World I Live In

I have refused to live
locked in the orderly house of
reasons and proofs.
The world I live in and believe in
is wider than that. And anyway,
what's wrong with maybe?

You wouldn't believe what once or
twice I have seen. I'll just
tell you this:
only if there are angels in your head will you
ever, possibly, see one.

Mary Oliver

I was raised on having my own personal guardian angel. Someone appointed by God but only if you were raised in the One True Faith. Angels weren't allocated to heathen or infidels or protestants - those breakaway Catholics who were sex obsessed and didn't have REAL communion like us.

If I listened closely I was told the angel would instruct me as to my behaviour and if I disobeyed, I would be reported to the Big Whitebearded Himself in the Sky who would arrange for punishment with the Big Horned Himself in the Everlasting Fires.

I had questions like these for the brainwashers:
(1) Is my angel a boy or a girl?
(2) How tall is my angel
(3) What's his/her name?
(5) Why does God talk to Satan about me?
(6) Where does (s)he fly to when not with me?
(7) Why can't I ever see him/her if I'm supposed to be listening all the time.
(8) How fast do they fly?
(9) Do their huge wings make a huge noise?

I was told to sit down and be quiet and stop questioning God who was sick and tired of me doubting Him. I was 6, just before my First Holy Communion when all such matters would become clear due to my soul being all sparkly and new along with my creepy bridal dress and my pleased, no doubt, nameless Guardian Angel.

In case you think this is all so very quaint and antediluvian, have a gander at the more recent witterings of the pope himself. I gather my angel got an upgrade to "ambassador" now. Like moving to first class, free, on a flight.

Which all brings me to the poem. I am a fan of Mary Oliver.

Angels in my head? Well dreams. I have dreams. Don't we all?


  1. I too like Mary Oliver's work, though this poem is new to me. Can't say I believe in angels though.

    1. Neither do I. But the pope does. Which says it all, really.


  2. From a very early age, I decided religion was so full of contradictions and unbelievable nonsense I wanted nothing to do with it. Fortunately my parents were equally irreligious. It staggers me that so many people take all this baloney seriously. Why not just stick to "do as you would be done by"?

  3. right there with you
    they are always with me and guiding me
    and you have to believe
    and really what do you have to lose
    by believing....

  4. I am a good person. Treat others with kindness.
    Anyone can believe what they will, but do not have to try to make me believe as they do.
    We can all be independent thinkers and so we should.
    Life should be worth living and we should try to make it so for every one we can.
    It is very hard to please everyone , so I only really worry about pleasing me. I am kind . I do the right thing and we all know what the right thing is.

  5. Let's go all sci-fi for a moment: Maybe 'angels' were originally space travellers who came to Earth to help humans, but were scared away by our aggressive tendencies. However folk tales of these flying creatures persisted, and have survived, via religion, much of which, anyway, is folk-tale-related. :-)

  6. Angels are genderless beings, have wide wings which are mostly folded, so make no noise. God talks to Satan because anyone else would just be too boring, you can’t see it (the angel) because imaginary friends are always invisible, it goes nowhere, it’s there to protect you and only you and hovers forever by your side and can’t wait for you to do something naughty. Angels are gossips and they talk to other angels about their humans and they have a competition about who has the most troublesome charge.
    The more troublesome the better.
    Ok? Got it?


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