Showing posts with label ukraine. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ukraine. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 19, 2022

Sanity


 

Do you ever wonder about your own status? I'm talking mental health of course, per the heading.

And what is sanity?

Well, here's a definition:

the ability to think and behave in a normal and rational manner; sound mental health.
"I began to doubt my own sanity"

We know what insanity is, of course - and this is just my recollection of a good one:

Performing the same task over and over and expecting different results. 

 Do we all fall between these, somewhere?

I don't know what thirty odd months of basic incarceration has done to my brain.

There have been spurts of outings and trips, but far too infrequent and, unlike some, I don't hold out any hope this pandemic is ever finished with us, too many variants with too many ineffective vaccines. I remember reading when I was in my early twenties that the greatest threat to humanity was a virus and it would take us all out.

I lived through the polio epidemic, which I've written about here. I've lived, again as a child, through the threats of cold war and nuclear chains being rattled every day on the news, and believing in the cataclysmic threats of Fatima - the angry virgin, seen by peasant children, threatening all of humanity until Russia succumbed to Christianity or some such rot. I imagine that must effect an unformed child-brain in ways we can't imagine. 

And yes, we all have trauma of some kind as children - from peer bullying, to drunken fathers (or mothers) to poverty and unimaginable abuse.

I suppose if I'm questioning my own state of mind, the brain health meter would point to sanity. 

I'm dealing with inertia, loads of it. It's hard to get enthusiastic, to experience joy, to make any kind of plans, to even call my doctor (who last time was coughing through a Covid variant- much to my shock as he was rigid in precautions).

There's also massive denial out here on The Edge of those also caught with The Covid. They label it something else, like cold or flu. Statistics are lacking. Many Covid deaths are written off as something else. The Economy defeats public health mandates or precautions.

And note I haven't touched climate change or Roe or Ukraine or all the other shyte happening around us. We really, really, don't deserve this planet. Like the pestilential fleas we are, we will be shrugged off. The Virus is winning.


All your thoughts are welcome.




Saturday, May 21, 2022

Meandering through the words

I plan on posting some excerpts of writing here this month, just to peak your curiosity as to what is going on with this memoir of six months of my life. I have workshopped some parts of it and got excellent feedback.

On other news, Daughter is coming in to town today and we will have brunch at our local. I had brunch there yesterday with a friend but I never tire of brunches. It always feel so civilized, as if all the time in the world is available to chat and have fill-ups on coffee and tea. So yesterday was three hours. I anticipate a lengthy one today too, though we may wander up the road and sit by the ocean for a while as it's so gorgeous a day out here.

I don't want to jinx my health status but right now this minute - though not perfect - I am feeling way better. I had to deal with an excess of potassium in my blood in the past couple of months which entailed a harsh treatment and the symptoms were frightening. Internal organs misbehaving. I honestly feel I have dodged many bullets including The Plague which is still raging through here as it is in most parts of the world. Though there is no longer statistical reportage and our Minister for Health tells us to toss the masks. I'm not. So I'm still practicing the utmost caution and only seeing those of like mind. The seniors out here are dying every week which is a caution in itself. The Culling, I call it. It enrages me.

So we were the first province in Canada to welcome Ukrainian refugees and it's so heartening to read of the kindness shown them and so many have been employed already. Their pets were included on the flight from Poland, cats and dogs. I leaked many tears.



Cam and Chuck arrived here to bless their peasants and steal some gifts and flowers. All the kowing and towing and bowing to this pair of welfare recipients frosts my you know what.



So there's your update from this outpost colony of the once "the sun never sets on us" British Empire.