It's like this. I casually check up on an old boyfriend on yer Googley machine. I do this now and again. Throw a name of an old lovie-dove into the big G and watch it spindry for a while and regurgitate an old Himself into something new and shiny or sodden and sad. It's fascinating. Everyone does this, don't they? No? Oh, c'mon! I'm the only one owning up to it then?
The odd one has an obit, I'll tell ya that can weird me out a bit. And in case you think I've been around the block a few times, well I have. But not as much as you're thinking even though I'm flattered that you would.
Well I did this with one the other night. And guess what, if he's not making a big name for himself in politics. Really big. All based on his honesty, open-mindedness and transparency. A manifesto, like. All printed up on his website like an old papyrus document. And a picture of Himself beside it, all blue-eyed truthiness with a matching sweater.
And I sit there gob-smacked.
Maybe I wasn't looking when we were madly in love a decade ago or maybe those qualities are like bunions – you grow them later on in life. But I remember the last sorry week of our relationship when it became evident he had done nothing but lie to me for the two years we were together.
And broke my heart.
I google my old flames from time to time too and wonder about their lives and how they've lived without me. I'm pretty sure it's a paltry existence at best.
ReplyDeletepolitics and honesty = oxymoron. Sorry you got your heart broken though
ReplyDeleteOh thank you Marcia, I knew there were two of us out there!
ReplyDeleteyes, I bet they're crying into their pillows every night after eating a dinner out of KFC!
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Twain:
ReplyDeleteI'm just amazed he got the gumption to go there, suits him well, the lying bastard.
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No, I've never googled my old flames, but I think I might give it a try!
ReplyDeletePoliticians are of course the experts in lying repeatedly with a straight face and concocting a public image the exact opposite of the private reality. So your experience doesn't surprise me. I'm just sorry the bastard broke your heart.
Nick:
ReplyDeleteThis sort of thing reinforces my political cynicism no end!
Thanks for the sympathy but I'm well over him as my people say!
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OOOOh WWW! If he becomes really famous and powerful you could sell your story to The Enquirer or some such rag for a pile of dosh (wink).
ReplyDeleteI know you wouldn't, though, 'cos some of us DO know what the word integrity means.
I once googled my ex-husband, from the 1960s, out of curiosity. I suspect he went back to his homeland (Italy) eventually and opened a restaurant, but couldn't tell whether he's still alive or not - I think not.
Other than that there's not much of a trail for any of my male buddies of the past - probably all "gone before", or living quiet lives of desperation, sans computer or on-line presence - and sans fanfare.
;-)
T:
ReplyDeleteAnd they are suffering silently in their monk-like cells without you.
Being romantically penitent for the one who got away 'n all.
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PS I'd like to scare the shite out of him though, I'm not too perfect ;^)
I married my old boyfriend and am now his ex. I'm afraid to look up any others. With my luck they will all have become politicians and not socialists either. I'm sorry you heart was broken and that after two years. They do know how to step on it, don't they?
ReplyDeleteBeen there - done that - glad to know it is just not me :) Could write a book and ruin them...
ReplyDeleteYou are better off without him, the scumbag!
ReplyDeleteI never thought of looking back. The past happened and nobody can change it. I try to look forward.
PS the word verification is 'gralab'
Are you manufacturing it?? :-)
Nora:
ReplyDeleteMy own fault, all the warning signs were there, I ignored them all.
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OWJ:
ReplyDeleteOh the secrets we harbour!
But the high road is always the best...
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GM:
ReplyDeleteMaybe my lessons come very hard but I find the examined past is a great teacher!
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