I don't have time to waste in other words, stop holding me up with your stupidz. Awful I know, but there it is. I also find I need more alone time than I used to. I relish my own company and am terribly fussy about my social engagements. And perversely I can be so wrong in my quick assessment of whether I will engage further or not.
I was hesitant about one such meet-up yesterday evening. It was a pretty packed social encounters day and the last coffee meetup was going to be quick. Instead it turned out to be one of the most fulfilling and interesting long chats of all with a young person who is going to work behind the scenes in so many capacities in our Senior Women Activist Group. She is media savvy and has done this type of work for quite a while. Gobsmacked doesn't quite cover my reaction and it shows me not to make rash and speedy judgement on the abilities and personalities of others. Most carry their lanterns unlit until another holds a match and I need to remember that.
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Does everyone have a kind of lunar cycle? Women? I find I can plot out my moods by this cycle. Just like when I menstruated (I had 40 years of that). I find it fascinating. I can tell when my energy falls below what is normal for me, when I get more irritable and when is the best time to complete tasks I've been putting off and when I can accomplish onerous tasks. You?
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It's very easy to misjudge people, based on some preconception about a certain type of face or mannerism or accent or whatever. Like you, I'm often surprised by someone who turns out to have abilities and talents I had no inkling of. Don't judge a book by looking at its cover - but I still do exactly that far too often!
ReplyDeleteYes, you'd think we'd learn the lesson. When people speak slowly I assume they're not very bright. A terrible trait as I am 100% incorrect in that.
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I agree with you that sometimes solitude is the best thing for us.
ReplyDeleteNothing like it at times, Gigi, to recharge our batteries.
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ReplyDeleteThat coffee grinder :) Three years ago we had to replace the one I inherited from Granny. It was a hand grinder, the grinding thingies were worn flat. And the modern replacement has already had its first maintenance, as one of the washers was worn. Eww for built-in-obsolescence (Thanks for this term in English).
ReplyDeleteI love those old hand grinders, unfortunately not good anymore due to the wearing down of the irreplaceable parts. I can't believe my baby still chugs along, I hope I haven't jinxed it.
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I think I have become more myself in my old age because I’ve finally stopped trying to fit in. I stopped with religion which I had tried all my life to believe. I have never liked crowds and now I value quiet and solitude even more. I tire more easily and enjoy my afternoon nap.
ReplyDeleteAs for appliances , I still use my mother’s Singer sewing machine in its original cabinet that she bought in 1961. Sews perfectly.
I find that I too have felt the freedom of not giving an eff for others' poor opinions of me, etc. It is wonderful. I love my solitude too and am so much kinder to myself than before.
DeleteI wish I had my mother's sewing machine, it was such a trojan, I made so many beautiful outfits on it as did she.
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LOVE that wrap.
ReplyDeleteI have become more comfortable with myself as I age. And to care (mostly) less about other people's assessments.
I DO make snap judgements about people (which are often right) but take a little time now before acting on them. If it makes sense I make the judgement and put it to one side for a bit and watch, wait and learn.
Yes a very good move to watch and wait. I believe we never stop learning even in old age. The ones who stop make me sad as they get stuck in the old records of their old complaints.
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I am more myself
ReplyDeletenow then ever in my life.
I like me.
Love your wrap and your words.
Yes, I sense that in your writing Ernestine. You are much more sure of your posts and only tailoring them for yourself and not others.
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Ernestine, I absolutely love that you said that. I too like me, after having spent a lifetime being not very fond of myself. Never feeling good, or clever, or efficient, or anything really, enough. Let’s hear it for the old girls!
DeleteThere are those of us who do the mental drumming of fingers but hide it successfully......or maybe we don't. We think we do but do people pick up on it?
ReplyDeleteI think we think we hide it but I'm sure our carefully arranged faces give the game away.
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That coffee bean grinder is amazing to still be working, you could tell the company. They could use it in their ads! Your wrap is both pretty and useful.
ReplyDeleteCompany long being folded down and I'm sure business moved to China. I was also thinking it cost my friend, probably, around $20 which in today's currency would amount to $100. And who spends that on a coffee grinder today? The whole outsourcing economy explained right there, Terra!
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Do you recommend any books to help me understand how we as women relate to a lunar cycle? I am 70 years old and have thought that there was something to the connection but forgot about my interest till your blog today. Thanks
ReplyDeleteI haven't read anything on it Judi but like yourself have been wondering for years how cyclical it is even post-menopause. Is it a thing? I truly believe it is. I don't think I need to read about it.
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OMG, that is a lot of K2tog, yo! And, it is a beauty!
ReplyDeleteOnce I was a finger tapper. My massive head injury changed all that; I can sit and stare, and would do so for hours if I didn't insist that my self do something, at least for a short time.
Thanks for the kind words on the wrap and for picking up on the stitch used!
DeleteJoanne, I love to sit and stare at nothing. It is restful and meditative. My to do list can run my life tho.
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The wrap turned out beautifully :)
ReplyDeleteI'm a lot more impatient than I used to be, mostly between 4pm and 7pm for some odd reason. Probably because I know I should get dinner started, but I'm on the computer or reading or someone knocks on the door, just little things that set me on edge a bit.
I hate knocks on my door, the unexpected ones. No matter who it is. I must have this awful frightening face on when I open the door (if I do). And have to readjust it if it is a neighbour dropping off homemade bread or the super dropping off a parcel. I have low tolerance for being interrupted in my important life. *grin*
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WWW you made me grin hard and giggle out loud at your comment about"my important life". You couldn't have stated my thought any more clear than that.
DeleteI love how you think!
It's so good to laugh at ourselves. You should see the important me in grubby PJs and hair uncombed :D
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I have no idea if I have a lunar cycle or how it might interact with my menstrual cycle. I'm not too observant that way but I'm sure it's true for some or even all of us.
ReplyDeleteThe wrap reminds me of a peacockj
Oh that's interesting on the wrap. I was trying to capture the colours around the icebergs. I am very pleased with it.
DeleteI was tracking my emotions on and off over the years as I can get quite down during certain points in the month and it's all beginning to make sense. I think Grandmother Moon has more power than we acknowledge.
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Odd that you talk about lunar cycles as only this morning a friend and I were discussing the mid summer solstice and other solar / lunar effects and this came up.
ReplyDeletehttps://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16407788
That coffee bean grinder is amazing at fifty and still going strong. I have nothing that old other than some almost antique furniture still going strong. One particular piece is a chest of drawers Rhodesian timber and Belgian mirror that I bought off a departing expat in 1975. It was already twenty five years old when I bought it. This Scot had spent his post war years in Rhodesia before coming to India on a posting and retired from service here. Quite a colourful fellow. A WWII POW escapee with a DSC!
What's a DSC Ramana? Yes, I have some old pieces but they are down to only a few now. I would haunt those wonderful country auctions in the good old days to fill the rather large marital century home. It was great fun.
DeleteI just read the link Ramana and it merits a post to FB. It explains a whole lot. Thank you.
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https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Distinguished_Service_Cross_(United_Kingdom)
ReplyDeleteAh. Thanks. I'm Irish. Lol.
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Damn, I just lost my comment through my own stupidity.
ReplyDeleteAfter having never really made friends I have recently started to meet with other women, not with all of them do I have a connection, many bore me. But I persevere because I am also realising that different people meet different needs. And if somebody doesn’t meet any need at all, well, then I just drop them again. I can feel myself change.
I don’t know about cycles, lunar or otherwise. Perhaps I had better watch myself a bit more, I just have off-days and less off-days, melancholy days and almost content days. Isn’t it wonderful not to bleed anymore? Heavens above, what women go through.
I think many who have been married or partnered don't need or see the need for friendships outside of other coupledoms. I have been fortunate in my friendships of such long duration through coupledoms and other challenges.
DeleteI think we can track our moodswings through the lunar cycle. And yes not bleeding is so wonderful I thought it would never be over.
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