The biggest overall challenge I've had in old age is slowing down. I adhere to the Spoons Theory for a while and then fall off by tackling too much in one day. What I mean by "too much" is one over the one alloted social engagement or two very short walks into stores or restaurants, say with Daughter.
I know this wandering about sounds outrageous in Covid Times but we're had no cases for the last 5 days and everyone is masked and tables are distanced and stores all look different with arrows and wide aisles and everyone following protocols. I know. Extraordinary. Hats off to everyone and particularly our Minister of Health, our Chief Medical Officer and our premier who all happen to be doctors. And whose modus operandi is "An Abundance of Caution," and the nautical term "Hold Fast, Newfoundland." with multiple media appearances and special little chats with children ("Yes, Santa Claus has been vaccinated.")
I tackled too much when Daughter was in here on Saturday. It would sound measly to my 60 year old ears but nowadays, I feel quite pathetically elderly when I have to be mobilised. I recognize my Covid weight isn't helping. But many of us resort to soothing "treats" during this stressful times. And I hold my hand up. And tips to avoid such indulgences would be welcome.
Today is Monday and I am going out later on with George in hand and a grocery order pickup. I had arranged this for Saturday when Daughter was here but the brain has also slowed down and I had forgotten to complete my order by pushing "confirm", another hiccup of old age. There are a few. And I feel inordinately ashamed when my glitches confuse and bother me.
I throw all this stuff out here as I am quite nervous about sharing all these wee failings of mine with anyone close to me. As is the case with most elders. These dangerous and lethal old age homes may await us if we display any kind of incompetence at all. So I am cautious of concentrating on tasks at hand. As I have left burners on and walked away from lit candles. My busy brain needs to offload more files.
Meanwhile I go back to the Spoon Theory and plan my week out more carefully. Life shouldn't be a trudge and a chore even if one's physical energy is severely limited as mine is.
I do tasks , go for a bit, stop for a bit, assess how I feel...continue or rest as I feel.
ReplyDeleteYes me too GP but it's not enough these days. In one fairly small shop I had to rest for a good 30 minutes, a first. Before, 5 minutes would set me to rights :(
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Yes. It shames and frightens me how few spoons I have at the moment. They are emphatically teaspoons rather than tablespoons too.
ReplyDeleteI do a bit. I stop. I feel okish. I do a bit more - and discover that I have used all of today's spoons (and possibly tomorrows as well).
Hugs.
And as an aside, blogger hides your posts from me. Which makes me angry. Which uses up a spoon (or more) very quickly.
Blogger hides my posts? That's the first report I had of such a thing, EC. Damn their google hides.
DeleteYes not a tablespoon in sight here, just mini-teaspoons and inordinate amount of rest-stops. I got out today but I feel it in every sinew and a kind of dizziness.
I have many of this week's spoons gone.
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I follow a multitude of blogs and rely on my reading list. Which, since the advent of blasted new blogger, is updated on a haphazard basis. Your posts don't appear until hours after you have posted them, and in the middle of blogs which I had already commented on. Hiss and spit. I have a grocery shopping trip today and later I am on call for LL. I think that is my spoons for the week done.
DeleteI do hope it sorts out EC. I use the very Old Google Reader which I agree is sporadically quite laggardly in updating.
DeleteI hear you on Monday and the spoons gone as I had planned laundry (the massive 100 mile hall trek) for Thursday and that may change.
Thanks heavens for 24 pairs of knickers.
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Oh yes too few spoons to many ideas. I too forget the burners, the candles, my purse or shopping list regularly, but I have done so from young age. Now, getting older, I run out of spoons before I run out of day. I always think that tomorrow, in spring, after a good nights sleep, when the holiday arrives, ... things will become better. This has yet to happen. Nut I still hope. And I hope for you and us all that a pandemia-free spring will replete our energy and give us all some silver spoons of a good size!
ReplyDeleteI have this way of thinking too Charlotte. Like tomorrow I'm going to wake up differently. And then when I do wake up I sometimes get debilitating foot cramps and snivel into myself knowing it's downhill from there.
ReplyDeleteMagical thinking. But it gives me a fantasy of comfort on the really down days.
Yes, let's hope. That's all we have as facts are not supporting it.
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My partner used to say 'No more than two things a day'. Now it is one. Life is a continual adjustment to what you are capable of and not something anyone should feel guilty about.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this Andrew. One thing. I desperately need to keep this in mind every day.
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Oh yes!! I forget that I simply cannot do the things I once did without any thought at all. One thing per day—one doctor appointment or one household project. I need to remember to count my blessings that I can still do as much as I do. But it is frustrating.
ReplyDeleteAnd saying no to others requesting time/attention etc. I need to practice no. Or saying "spoons all gone" let's look at February. You know what I mean.
DeleteI have a massive understanding now of old people who would talk like that. I have a dentist appointment, that's me done for today. I want to time travel and apologise.
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I took two spills last year, and barely managed to crawl somewhere to haul myself up. This is the first time I've mentioned it. I am allergic to candle scents, so I'm safe there, and when my neighbor handed me a little plate of cookies, I turned her down. I know she was offended, but sugar cures nothing. I did call her the next day to have a general gossip conversation and hopefully mollify her.
ReplyDeleteOh Joanne I am so sorry but I totally get you. So much shame in enfeeblement isn't there. Another blogger was stuck in a tub for 1-1/2 hours and EMT had to pry her out. I would have died. And probably wouldn't have bravely posted about it either.
DeleteSugar is deadly. I have a hard time kicking it.
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I'm not yet 50 (nearly) and I can't tell you the number of things I thought I ordered but didn't confirm. I blame website design for some of that because it happens more on some sites than others.
ReplyDeleteAging is just a long process of loss, I find. Annoying. It's "lucky" we get more and more practiced
Thanks for that Kylie. I apologised all over the place to the workers who were apologising to me. I said to them I was just doing stupid rather well for the last few days and they laughed.
DeleteYou are so young Kylie, younger than my daughters. But nothing will surprise you as you age!
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I've slowed down quite a lot since Covid came to Australia, I'm afraid I've got to the point of using it as an excuse now to not get out and about, but instead view the world via computer. I've had the odd "senior" moment, holding my fingers under the running water and wondering why it wasn't heating to wash my dishes, but failing to notice right away that I hadn't turned the handle to the hot setting, making a mug of hot milo and putting it in the fridge and carrying the milk carton to the table instead.
ReplyDeleteGosh I don't feel so bad now. I am always amazed at myself when I sort my weekly pills, a job that used to make me so impatient but now I slow it down and think to myself, I'm still doing this correctly and there are masses of pills.
DeleteWe need to praise ourselves for tasks well done and when we do turn off the heat under the eggs, LOL.
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I have those hiccups where I forget to do small things, or do them, forget I did, then try to do them again!
ReplyDeleteSocially I've never been able to tolerate more than one event, any size, per day, even when I had much more energy than now. So it's not new now, but even more necessary because there's a tiredness factor now.
I hear you Boud, I was never one to run around to different "events" or social engagements as I have no tolerance for small talk and prefer more depth to my interactions.
DeleteI forget the tiniest things like even after saying to myself, don't forget the mug on the table in the living room I walk away without it.
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And we won't mention boiling a pan of water and forgetting to put the egg in, will we?
ReplyDeleteI forgot about that, and my stellar morning when I waited patiently for my ground dark roast to produce coffee without a drop of water in the machine.
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TGIJ! (Thank gods it's January) The Xmas season does me in completely, more so this year. Praise be for surviving, all of us.
ReplyDeleteTip for avoiding indulgences: pick one, only one, and jettison. When you've recovered from the loss, pick another. Do not seek substitutes unless it's an indulgence you are already indulging in. Its number will be up next.
I know whereof you speak on past Christmases but this one was remarkably lovely. I never take any such event for granted and my spirit weeps inside with gratitude that I have been so fortunate. As so many find it dismal, lonely and depressing. I've been there.
DeleteYou are very strong willed Annie. I'm the one scrounging in the garbage for what I tossed!!
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It does help to have your daughter to help you. But, take it easy, too.
ReplyDeleteIt's easier said than done Gigi, as so much as to be accomplished in a day, getting out of bed is one, LOL.
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I walk away from lit candles too. Well hey, who stays in one room all the time? I'm on the move, baby.
ReplyDelete"tips to avoid such indulgences would be welcome."
Don't leave the treats on the counter or table or anywhere in sight. Put them away in the fridge or inside the cupboard.
This makes a huge difference around here. Out of sight is more often (certainly not always) out of mind, and less likely to be picked up on the way past.
xoxoxo
Kate
Good tip, Kate. My goto comfort are dark chocolate Tim-Tams. I stopped the icecream a while back. I just checked on the location of aforementioned Tims and they are within reach on the coffee table, gone to the depths of a cupboard now.
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I too practice and abundance of caution, which here in the USA means stay home, rarely venture out. It must be wonderful to live in a country that's run and administered properly.
ReplyDeleteYou will have that country soon Inger, fingers crossed that more damage is not done to it. And that Joe will do a good job. Faith.
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The spoon theory is very interesting. Slowing down as one ages is natural and is to be accepted. Yes, it can be annoying but, what is the alternative?
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